BORDERLINE

BLOG CLOSED

2010-12-05T22:20:00.001+10:00

Thanks for all the love & support groovers.

I'm officially offline, and gone.....

See ya!!!

FILM REVIEW - Nightmare Alley (2010)

2010-12-05T21:45:00.000+10:00

I'm always keen to give indie films a bit of a leg-up, and for those who have read any of the film reviews on BORDERLINE, you'll find that most reviews on here are either cult, little known, or independent flicks that are floating around out there.

With limited budgets, lo-fi production, and a DIY ethic, indie films have always been more of a labour of love than a money making venture, and the chances of an indie production making it or breaking it usually falls into the latter basket. Which I guess is why when something interesting comes along, I don't mind giving it a bit of a plug.

So sit back, and streeeeetch your sacks, while we go for a bit of a wander thru the darkened back streets of Walter Ruether's 2010 indie film "Nightmare Alley".

HIT IT UP

Essentially, what you've got is 7 short stories, joined by a brief monologue between each story, based on a number of ideas and concepts from the mind of one Walter Ruether, Director and Writer of Nightmare Alley. There's plenty of gore in Nightmare Alley: you get zombies eating brains, bodies being hacked to bits, axes to the head, cannibalism, decapitations, entrails being spilled, and lots of stabbings/slashing, all in the vein of Herschell Gordon Lewis and Ted V. Mikels films. And to top it off, all of it has been filmed with a grainy overlay to give it a "washed out" vibe.

THE DEAL

1. A Fistful of Innards

For me, the Nightmare Alley story with the best possible scenario which could have in itself made for a great movie. Cowboys stumble across a meteorite that turns the dead into zombies. What's not to like? It started out great, but the ending kinda trailed off without any defining moment. Still, a great theme if only it would have been played out more.

2. Rebellion

A rat statue that turns evil when a pentagram necklace gets put around its throat. It's funny, and I really did like the story to it. And must admit that this vignette had a well defined start, story, and ending. And a kick-ass car!!!

3. Death Chat

Guy who cheats on his missus using the internet and gets more than he bargained for in the end. My least favourite story, and altho some of the make-up was kinda cool, it just didn't do it for me as a short story.

4. Meat

Up-sized dude in Daisy Dukes cut-off denims tries it on the next door neighbour down by the pool. Gets a leg in, only to have her old man walk in before it gets started. He bails, she kills the husband, and gets the Up-sized dude back for dinner the next night. Dinner just so happens to be the husband....

5. Closet Case

The token GLBT story of the bunch with the annoying gender dysphoric kid driving the dude at the bus stop over the edge to the point of getting a knife to the stomach. Did somebody order entrails? Over the top, but gore+++

6. The Great Damone

Piece about an artist entering his work into an art show who tries to do something new and is driven insane by his never ending nag of a wife who, eventually, ends up becoming a "part" of The Great Damone's new art project!!!

7. Slash of the Blade

Basically a kind of "Ghost of Jack the Ripper" story with lots & lots of slashings and blood, but without any real storyline or direction to the piece.

THE FEEL

As an indie film punter, for the most part, indie movie's are either fully hit, or totally missed. Nightmare Alley really had some awesome potential in there, and I really would have like to see a few of the stories "played out" a bit more. Often, I felt like I had been left 'hanging', and the story just seemed to end without any really defined point. Which was a shame, because some of the storylines within themselves actually rocked. A number of the visuals and effects were pretty sweet, but the Grind-O-Scope effect was a bit of a hit & miss with me. Sometimes it became more of a distraction rather than enhancing the scene, but I do appreciate the idea. The music was a definite high point, and kudos to Ruether for incorporating some really great musical scores into the film. If you dig the whole Creepshow presentation style approach, then Nightmare Alley is right up your... ummmm.... alley! Overall, the concept for Nightmare Alley was a definite winner, I just would have liked to have seen a few of the stories fleshed out a bit more. Nightmare Alley is available right now at Blockbuster online.

SKULL SCORE OUT OF 5:

THE REAL

Directors: Laurence Holloway, Scarlet Fry
Writers: Scarlet Fry, Laurence Holloway
Stars: Vincent Bocchini, Scott Boyd and Tara Carlton

REFERENCES

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1620557/

Written review by stonerphonic © December 2010

Halloween - Dead Kennedys (1982)

2010-10-31T00:47:00.000+10:00

"Halloween" (B-side "Saturday Night Holocaust") is the seventh and final single by the Dead Kennedys. It was released in December 1982 on Alternative Tentacles. The lyrics use the metaphor of a Halloween party to address the theme of human responses to nonconformity.The song is from the band's second album, Plastic Surgery Disasters.

Happy Halloween you punks...

stonerphonic

BORDERLINE Breaking News - OMG... THEY ARRIVED!!!

2010-10-09T10:39:00.000+10:00

Whoaaaaaaaaaaa......

I can't believe it. THEY ARRIVED. In the mail. After only 2 and a bit weeks!!!

And even before they hit the store shelves....

Holy enchanted thoughtfist Batman, I have in my horrible little hands the long awaited very 1st Issues of two forgotten (and for the most part unseen outside of Canada & the United States) Cult Movie Classics in the form of 1990's TERMINAL CITY RICOCHET and 1999's THE WIDOWER.

For those who came in late....

TERMINAL CITY RICOCHET:
Never available on VHS and rarely shown outside of Canada, this dystopian vision is as timely as ever, and it includes the classic soundtrack that we released in 1989. This DVD + Soundtrack CD (and its sister DVD+CD, The Widower) is a must-have for anyone who loves punk, Jello Biafra, incisive media critiques like "Network" & "Wag The Dog," and/or dystopian nightmares like "1984" "Max Headroom" & "Brazil."

THE WIDOWER:
This instant cult classic is a surreal black romantic comedy featuring Jello Biafra, Joey "Shithead" Keithley, Ani Kyd, and Nardwuar The Human Serviette. The DVD comes with the star-studded, never released soundtrack featuring DOA, Neko Case And Her Boyfriends, The Evaporators, & more!

OMG.... did you read that bit too... NEVER BEFORE RELEASED!!!

And I have them. In my greasy little mits.

Right here..... Right NOW!!!

As soon as I've stopped jumping up and down and get a grip on myself (Yea stoner, get a grip... Ed.), I'll smack these thru the DVD "Player of Doom" and get an awesome "Double Feature Review" out for all you Jello-philes right here... on BODERLINE.

Fuck. I need a valium....

Back later kids... to the Batcave boy wonder!

FILM REVIEW - Survival of the Dead (2010)

2010-10-03T18:07:00.000+10:00

THE DEAL

I am a self confessed George A. Romero freak.

I have quiet a number of Romero films.

I have a Dawn of the Dead AND a Night of the Living Dead T-Shirt. And I wear them with pride.

But "Survival of the Dead" was just plain and truthfully terrible. Terrible...

And it should have been done like this...

Survival of the Dead was so damn bad I didn't finish the film. I can handle Romero doing self parody. But I can't handle ANY director who doesn't even try.

And in my personal opinion, with regards Survival of the Dead, Romero didn't even try. At all.

When Romero tries to do a decent zombie film again, I'll try and do a proper film review of said zombie film...

SKULL SCORE OUT OF 5

You've GOT to be kidding me...

THE REAL

Directed by George A. Romero

Produced by Paula Devonshire

Written by George A. Romero

Running time 90 minutes

Release date March 15, 2010

REFERENCES

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Survival_of_the_dead

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Night_of_the_Living_Dead

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dawn_of_the_Dead

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/George_A._Romero

Written review by stonerphonic © October 2010
All rights reserved

HEROES - Part 5: Cat Stevens

2010-09-28T17:03:00.000+10:00

It's not time to make a change...

Y'know, when I look back over these pieces it's amazing that none of my heroes every actually uses their real names. Most of them have at least 3 or 4 pseudonyms or non-de-plumes they employ for varying purposes. And the scarier thought is that I often have done the same thing throughout my own life. Again as a line of demarcation, but sometimes it means more.

And Cat Stevens is no different. For me Cat Stevens falls into the same category as Malcolm X as far as the ability to change when change requires you to do so. The only difference is that Cat had a much bigger ego to deal with.

I draw a lot from Cat's passion. He put his whole heart into the words of his art. But hey, a lot of artists do that man, big deal. So yeah there has to be more involved...

I was very fortunate to have been brought up + nurtured in a very artistic, liberal and non-judgemental home environment. My sister is a conservatorium trained pianist who teaches piano in her spare time, and my father is president + chair of a number of keyboard clubs n south east Queensland, and collects old keyboards and organs as a hobby. My mother sings, and has an incredible vocal range, and I loved as a child to hide in another room and just listen to her without her knowing I was there, coz she just goes right off when she thinks no one's around.

As for me, my artistic flair is manifest across a very wide spectrum. If i can put two objects together two make a mark, I will. Pencil, paint, ink, charcoal, airbrush....anything. Of course I also love to make music, and went on to belt on keyboards, violins, guitars and then turntables. I also have an awesome collection of clay ocarinas, and even have a theremin for when i really wanna take it to another level. So, I had a good grounding and importantly, lots of encouragement to express myself. Couple all of this with the fact that my earliest childhood memories consist of my father reading to me, and if i could say thanks to my dad for only 1 thing, that would be it. It provided me with an avenue to intelligently direct my artistic passions and flair. Which, um, is what I'm doing now I guess!!!

But hey, what's all this got to do with Cat Stevens dude?

Well, growing up I was always different, and even though I got to always hang with the 'in' crowd, I never did quite fit in. And I always managed to defy accepted thought and standards -
Nobody had earrings, I got my ears pierced
Everybody got earrings, I took mine out...
I had really long hair, everybody else had short
They finally grew theirs, hell, I shaved mine clean off...
All my friends covered themselves in ink, i stayed clean of ink
They all want to get rid of their tatts now, ah, sucks to be you....

But hey, I didn't do that stuff just to be different. I did that stuff because that's where my heart was. And I wasn't worried about being different. I was worried about being me.

And Cat Stevens did the same thing throughout his career. He constantly 'shot himself in the foot' from a corporate marketing point of view. And it's well known that he drove the industry executives insane because of either not following current musical market trends, or sticking with what was 'working' for him at the time. Yes Cat, what where you thinking? Creative expression and adventure? How foolish, considering the real aim of the music industry is how much money we can sell your ass for. Coz that's all the bean counters in the smoke filled boardrooms are concerned with. And of course the fans don't really care about the depth of artist's songs, which explains why we have Myley Cyrus selling out stadiums.

If you check out Cat's albums, you can clearly map out the progression, growth and change within the artist, even from the album titles themselves. And because he was writing about himself from his heart, you actually get to watch a person grow and change through his thoughts and feelings as laid out in the songs. How cool is that?

Bullshit man.
Big fucking deal starchild.
Heaps of dudes still do that kinda stuff today.
Hell, check out System Of A Down dude...

Um, yeah. Sure...

But (and this is the point), at the height of his career, his wealth, his fame, hell... even his ego, in 1976 at the end of his MAJIKAT Earth Tour, he walked off the stage and walked away from the entire industry. Literaly. Now, the reason behind why he walked away is common knowledge. He nearly drowned, did a deal with a higher power, made it out alive, and became a devout Muslim and then morphed into Yusuf Islam, who he still is today.

As I've stated before, I'm not interested in anyone's politics and religion. And I'm not interested in Cat's either. But, I do admire the fact that (regardless of being a right or wrong choice) the man made a promise, and he kept it. Regardless of the cost involved. And this promise cost him a lot. And that's what I find groovy about him. That kinda courage, to stick to your principles. To do what you promise despite the negative costs involved. That's hardcore. Coz keeping your promises is heaps important. It's about being true to yourself.

Today Cat Stevens uses his energies and money to finance education facilities for children in the UK. And as an adult educator myself, what better way to use your resources and expend yourself than by teaching, encouraging, inspiring and empowering tomorrow's leaders? Cat Stevens was very protective of his artistic output, and refused to have others dictate to him how his thoughts and feelings should be presented. And I admire that very much in a person. And that's kinda what I'm doing now. Sharing myself not as others would have me be, but rather it's me sharing myself as I truly am. It's all me....

Even the really boring crappy bits in there. That's me too...

Now, I don't recommend stuff to people, coz there's nothing worse than going "Dude, this rocks" to a mate, who then checks it out, misses the point and then says "nah, that sucked big time". So, I'm not gunna encourage you to check out a Cat Stevens album or anything. But hey, if you already have, or just so happen to check 1 out, let me know what you think. And for the real adventurous punters, there's always the movie 'Harold and Maude', which is the only movie Cat did the entire soundtrack for. A very, very black comedy. Very inspiring. And I know you've made the effort to see it now Ms Malvar, haven't you...

So, it's all about being true to yourself.
And others too.
Despite popularity.
Despite cost.

But hey, it's not time to make a change, just relax, take it easy. You're still young, that's your fault, there's so much you have to learn........ *(1)

END OF PART 5

NEXT WEEK: HEROES - Part 6 - Conscientious Objectors

If you're still here... thank you.

Please feel free to comment on my pieces. I willingly accept constructive criticism and comments on all my work. Hell, I'll take non-constructive criticism too. It's not life or death stuff y'know...

I believe in respect. I'm not asking you to agree with anything in this piece, but please allow me to have my opinion. Remember, I openly admit I don't read other peoples stuff. Hey, you don't have to read mine, and I'm happy to let you write yours.

Did i push your buttons? If I did, then share this shit with your friends.
Go on, hit that forward button...

All the words & mindless ramblings in BORDERLINE (c) 2008 - 2010 stonerphonic unless otherwise stated.
Find my punk ass - http://www.facebook.com/stonerphonic
Write my punk ass - stonerphonic@hotmail.com

Quotes

* (1) Cat Stevens. Father and Son - "Tea for the Tillerman" (Island Records)

FILM REVIEW - Profondo Rosso (1975)

2010-09-26T18:33:00.003+10:00

Yea yea yea. I know. I promised a huge Argento-a-thon months & months ago in the form of a retrospective DVD box set film review of sorts. Been busy and went trippin the light fantastic. But I'm back. So... without further ado...

Let's have our asses some Argento, starting with DEEP RED...

Que the high pitched Moog intro...

HIT IT UP

1975's Profondo Rosso (also known as Deep Red or The Hatchet Murders) is probably Dario Argento's best know and most popular cinematic presentation amongst Giallo and Horror afecionados alike. Profondo Rosso provided Argento with international exposure, helped amass a legion of fans, and set industry standards for Thriller and Horror genres.

The original Italian version kicks in at 126 minutes worth of film, whereas a lot of US versions remove around 22 minutes worth of footage. Most footage removed includes the graphic violence, all humorous scenes, almost all of the 'romantic interludes' between David Hemmings and Daria Nicolodi, and unfortunately part of the subplot regarding the house of the screaming child. Ripped off badly there my American friendos...

For the rest of the free world, the full-length Italian version (with English subtitles and one small cut by UK censors) is available on video in the UK. But for the hardcore Argento freaks out there, the only known widescreen print of this full-length Italian version can be found in... wait for it... Australia!!! This version is completely uncut and is screened on both SBS-TV and its pay-TV channel World Movies. And you thought all we had was Steve Irwin jumping on crocs and bloody kangaroos.

THE DEAL

The basic story behind Profondo Rosso is we have music teacher Marcus Daly (Hemmings) as he investigates the violent murder of psychic medium Helga Ulmann (Macha Meril), which he witnesses in an apartment building. After his attempt to rescue the medium fails, Daly realises he could have seen the killer’s face among a group of portraits on the wall of the victim’s apartment but is unable to find or recognize it when the police arrive. Later in the film, he also initially overlooks another clue that causes him to discover a mouldering corpse walled up in a derelict house. In typical Argento fashion, one murder leads to a series of others as Daly’s obsession with this vital clue that he fails to understand endangers his life and that of everyone with whom he comes into contact. This inability of a character to interpret or comprehend what he has seen is a common theme in Argento’s films and was used repeatedly in Tenebrae.

Get back, or I'll knit you to death, I swear...

The killing of Helga Ulmann is prefaced by a child’s doggerel tune, the same music that accompanies the film’s opening sequence in which two shadowy figures struggle until one of them is stabbed to death. The music serves as the murderer’s calling card. When Daly hears it in his own apartment soon after becoming involved in the case he is able to foil his attacker. Later, he plays the tune to Giordani, a psychiatrist, who theorizes that the music is important because it probably played an integral part in a traumatic event in the killer's past. The doctor’s theory is of course correct, as the identity of the killer is finally revealed as Carlo’s insane mother Martha (Clara Calamai). When Carlo was still a child, he watched as she murdered her husband when he tried to have her committed, then entomb his body in a room of their house. Daly’s discovery of the corpse is one of the film’s most dramatic moments.

Mrs Bates, it's about your son Norman...

In the climax, Martha confronts Marcus and tries to kill him. Wielding a butchering knife, Martha chases him around the complex and into a room with an elevator. Marcus is stabbed in the shoulder by the knife, and kicks Martha toward the elevator shaft. A long necklace she wears catches in the bars of the shaft, leading to her death by decapitation when Daly summons the lift. The film ends with Daly staring into the resultant pool of blood.

THE FEEL

Profondo Rosso follows fairly classic Italian Giallo plot lines, and as such for me is much more Argento Thriller than your Argento Horror styling. The film is violent (unless you're watching the US version... sorry...) and filled with massive amounts of suspense and "build up" moments, all focused of the machinations of murder. If you like your films with a fair degree of "ultra violence", for a 1970's film Profondo Rosso was certainly just that, ultra violent. Killing scenes were particularly drawn out and emphasised, and the blood flowed red. Stabbings, hot water scalding, bashings, decapitation, Profondo Rosso is replete with them all.

Argento was originally slated for the American History X remake

One of the cooler directorial aspects used by Argento through the film is the presaging of events by other minor, or seemingly insignificant events. As an example, the bathtub murder is "played out" by an earlier scene when Daly is scalded by an espresso machine. The same is seen where a child’s doll hanging from a noose and a brief cut to a dog fight foretells the killer's demise at the end of the film. The chain worn around the killer's neck becomes entangled in the bars of an elevator and lifts the killer into the air until they are decapitated.

Shaun, You've got red on you...

With Profondo Rosso, Argento started implementing many techniques that would become his trademarks in films to come. The very noticeable usage of odd camera angles, rolling cameras, and weird lighting techniques found their first usage by Argento in Profondo Rosso. Too, Profondo Rosso was the 1st of a number of films Argento employed Italian Prog Rock band Goblin in to rip out a more than memorable musical score for. Go on. Admit it. Don't you wish YOU wrote and performed the opening musical score? Yea, me too...

As far as horror/ thriller/ slasher films go, it's more than a hoot. Even Argento himself had a ball making it, so the stories go. Not only did he direct the film and write the script, he did actually act in it too. The closeup shots of the killer's hands, clad in black leather gloves, were performed by Argento. The film inspired him so much that he named his shop in Rome 'Profondo Rosso' after this film.

On the down side, on 16 May 2010 George A. Romero announced he planned the 3-D remake of Deep Red. The release is planned for 2011 an will completely screened in English-language. Let's hope it doesn't turn out like Romero's current utterly unforgivable excuse for a movie, Survival of the Dead (2010). Eeeehhhh....

No George, noooooooo......

SKULL SCORE OUT OF 5

Seriously kids, it's pretty damn hard to not give this piece of horror movie history anything but a perfect goddamn score. Even them hardass fuckers over at Rotten Tomatoes give this a damn perfect 100% rating. You honestly want me to go against that shit? Didn't think so...

THE REAL

Directed by Dario Argento

Produced by Salvatore Argento

Written by Dario Argento and Bernardino Zapponi

Cinematography by Luigi Kuveiller

Starring David Hemmings Daria Nicolodi

Music by Goblin

Release date(s) March 7, 1975 (Italy) June 11, 1976 (US) January 18, 1980 (US re-release)

Running time 126 min

REFERENCES

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Deep_Red

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Goblin_%28band%29
http://www.rottentomatoes.com/m/deep_red_the_hatchet_murders/

Written review and animated movie GIFs by stonerphonic © September 2010
All rights reserved

The Most Essential Cult Movies of the 1970's

2010-08-20T21:06:00.001+10:00

The Mike over at From Midnight, With Love has unleashed a meme that has pulled me out of hibernation for all but a brief moment of time. I couldn't let this meme go untouched without adding my 2 cents worth to the deal for the simple fact that in The Mike's own blog post "Hey, Midnight Warriors! Wanna talk about some '70s Cult Films?" he states that a large number of bloggers out there weren't around during the 70's to actually enjoy these cult films on the silver screen when first released.

Well guess what boppers? I was....

Soooooo... not only am I more than qualified to spruik on my soap box about the glory of cult films from the 1970's, being the smartass that I am, my own TOP 5 list will only comprise of both "true" 1970's cult films that I personally got to "spy with my little eye" up there on the big screen AND have in my own movie collection. See. Told you I'm a smartass....

So, before I kick into my Top 5 list, let's set ourselves a half decent benchmark. Firstly, how the hell do we define a "Cult" film?

A cult film (also known as a cult movie/picture or a cult classic) is a film that has acquired a highly devoted but specific group of fans. Often, cult movies have failed to achieve fame outside the small fanbases; however, there have been exceptions that have managed to gain fame among mainstream audiences. Many cult movies have gone on to transcend their original cult status and have become recognized as classics; others are of the "so bad it's good" variety and are destined to remain in obscurity. Cult films often become the source of a thriving, obsessive, and elaborate subculture of fandom, hence the analogy to cults. However, not every film with a devoted fanbase is necessarily a cult film. Usually, cult films have limited but very special, noted appeal.

Cult films are often known to be eccentric, often do not follow traditional standards of mainstream cinema and usually explore topics not considered in any way mainstream—yet there are examples that are relatively normal. Many are often considered controversial because they step outside standard narrative and technical conventions. (1)

So with that thought in mind boppers, let's take "a jump to the left, and then a step to the right" back into the 70's and kick out a list of -

MY TOP 5 "MOST ESSENTIAL CULT MOVIES OF THE 1970's"

NUMBER 5

LOGAN'S RUN

The Lowdown

Logan's Run is a 1976 science fiction film based on the novel of the same name by William F. Nolan and George Clayton Johnson. It depicts a dystopian future society in which population and the consumption of resources are managed and maintained in equilibrium by the simple expediency of killing everyone who reaches the age of thirty, preventing overpopulation. The story follows the actions of Logan 5, a "Sandman," as he "runs" from society's lethal demand.

The film version, directed by Michael Anderson and starring Michael York, Richard Jordan, and Jenny Agutter, was shot primarily in the Dallas/Fort Worth Metroplex (including locations such as the Fort Worth Water Gardens and the Dallas Market Center) between June and September 1975. The film only uses the basic premise from the novel (everyone must die at a specific age, Logan runs with Jessica as his companion while being chased by Francis). The motivations of the characters are quite different in the film. It was the first film made using Dolby Stereo.

Since 1994, there have been several unsuccessful attempts to remake the film. (Thank fuck for that....Ed.)

The Story

Sometime in the 23rd century...the survivors of war, overpopulation and pollution are living in a great domed city, sealed away from the forgotten world outside. Here, in an ecologically balanced world, mankind lives only for pleasure, freed by the servo-mechanisms which provide everything. There's just one catch: Life must end at thirty unless reborn in the fiery ritual of Carousel.

The Really Cool Shit

The movie is often eclipsed by science fiction movies which came after it, such as Star Wars, Close Encounters of the Third Kind, Blade Runner, and Alien. However, for a few years following the film, science fiction conventions sometimes featured "Runs" (either organized by the convention or done ad-hoc by fans of the film); these were a chase game similar to Tag, in which the Runners (most in costume) fled from a handful of Sandmen (also in costume). These decreased in popularity following several occasions in which police responded to frantic calls made by observers who mistook them for real chases.

NUMBER 4

WESTWORLD

The Low down

Westworld is a 1973 science fiction / thriller film written and directed by novelist Michael Crichton and produced by Paul Lazarus III. It stars Yul Brynner as a lifelike robot in a futuristic Western-themed amusement park, and Richard Benjamin and James Brolin as customers who are attacked by the park's robots when they malfunction.

Westworld was the last movie MGM produced before dissolving its releasing company, and was the first theatrical feature directed by Crichton. It was also the first feature film to use digital image processing to pixellate photography to simulate an android point of view. The film was nominated for Hugo, Nebula and Golden Scroll (a.k.a. Saturn) awards, and was followed by a sequel film, Futureworld, and a short-lived television series, Beyond Westworld.

The Story

The story is set sometime in the near future, in Delos, a high-tech, highly realistic fictional adult amusement park featuring androids that are almost indistinguishable from human beings. For a price of $1,000 per day, guests may indulge in any fantasy, including killing or having sex with the androids. The androids are programmed to act in character for each of the park's three themed zones: WesternWorld (the American Old West), MedievalWorld (medieval Europe), and RomanWorld (pre-Christian Rome). One of the main attractions in WesternWorld is the Gunslinger (Brynner), a robot programmed to start duels. Thanks to its programming, humans can always outdraw the Gunslinger and kill it. The guns issued to the guests also have temperature sensors that prevent them from shooting each other or anything else living but allow them to 'kill' the room-temperature androids.

The Really Cool Shit

Westworld was the first feature film to use digital image processing. John Whitney Jr. and Gary Demos at Information International Inc. (aka "Triple I") digitally processed motion picture photography to appear pixelized in order to portray the Gunslinger android's point of view. The approximately 2 minutes and 31 seconds worth of cinegraphic block portraiture was accomplished by color-separating (3 basic color separations plus black mask) each frame of source 70mm footage, scanning each of these elements to convert into rectangular blocks, then adding basic color according to the tone values developed. The resulting coarse pixel matrix was output back to film. The process was covered in the American Cinematographer article Behind the scenes of Westworld.

NUMBER 3

HAROLD AND MAUDE

The Low Down

Harold and Maude is a 1971 American comedy film directed by Hal Ashby. It incorporates elements of dark humor and existentialist drama, with a plot that revolves around the exploits of a young man intrigued with death, Harold (played by Bud Cort). Harold drifts away from the life that his detached mother prescribes for him, and develops a relationship with an elderly woman named Maude (played by Ruth Gordon).

The film is ranked number 45 on the American Film Institute's list of 100 Funniest Movies of all Time, and was selected for preservation in the National Film Registry of the Library of Congress in 1997 for being "culturally, historically, or aesthetically significant." The film was a commercial flop in its original release, and critical reception was extremely mixed. However, it has since developed a large cult following.

The Story

Harold Chasen (Bud Cort) is a 19-year-old boy obsessed with death. He regularly stages elaborate suicides, attends funerals, and drives a hearse, all to the chagrin of his mother, socialite Mrs. Chasen (Vivian Pickles). At services for a total stranger, Harold meets Maude (Ruth Gordon), a 79-year-old woman who shares Harold's hobby of attending funerals for fun. He is entranced by her quirky outlook on life, which is bright and excessively carefree in contrast with his own morbidity. The pair form a bond, and Maude slowly shows Harold the pleasures of art and music (Harold is taught to play banjo), and teaches him how to "[make] the most of his time on earth." Meanwhile, Harold's mother determines, much against Harold's wishes, to find him a wife to settle down with. One by one, Harold frightens and horrifies each of his appointed dates by appearing to commit gruesome acts such as self-immolation, self-mutilation, and seppuku.

As they become closer, Harold announces that he will marry Maude, resulting in disgusted outbursts from his family. Maude's 80th birthday arrives, and Harold throws a surprise party for her. As the couple dance, Maude tells Harold that she "couldn't imagine a lovelier farewell." He immediately questions Maude as to her meaning, and she reveals that she has purposely taken an overdose of sleeping pills and will be dead by midnight. She restates her firm belief that 80 is the proper age to die.

Harold rushes Maude to the hospital, where she is treated unsuccessfully and dies. In the final sequence, Harold's car is seen going off a seaside cliff, but after the crash, the final shot reveals Harold standing quite calmly atop the cliff, holding his banjo. After gazing down at the wreckage, he dances away, picking out on his banjo Cat Stevens' "If You Want to Sing Out, Sing Out".

The Really Cool Shit

Harold and Maude is #45 on the American Film Institute’s list of 100 Years... 100 Laughs, the list of the top 100 films in American comedy. The list was released in 2000. Two years later, AFI released the list AFI's 100 Years... 100 Passions honoring the most romantic films for the past 100 years, Harold and Maude ranked #69. Entertainment Weekly ranked the film #4 on their list of “The Top 50 Cult Films.”

In June 2008, AFI revealed its "Ten Top Ten" - the best ten films in ten "classic" American film genres - after polling over 1,500 people from the creative community. Harold and Maude was acknowledged as the ninth best film in the romantic comedy genre.

NUMBER 2

THE WARRIORS

The Low Down

The Warriors is a 1979 American cult action/thriller film directed by Walter Hill and based on Sol Yurick's 1965 novel of the same name. Like the novel, the film borrows elements from the Anabasis by Xenophon.

The Story

Cyrus (Roger Hill), leader of the Gramercy Riffs, the most powerful gang in New York City, calls a midnight summit of all New York area gangs, all of them asked to send nine unarmed representatives to Van Cortlandt Park. The Warriors, from Coney Island, Brooklyn, are one such gang.

Cyrus tells the assembled crowd that a permanent citywide truce would allow the gangs to control the city, pointing out there are 60,000 of them and only 20,000 officers in the NYPD. Most of the gangs laud his idea, but Luther (David Patrick Kelly), leader of the Rogues uses a smuggled gun to shoot Cyrus. Panic ensues and the NYPD rushes in. Fox (Thomas G. Waites) one of the Warriors, sees Luther commit the shooting, but in the chaos, Luther screams that the Warriors are responsible. While the Riffs beat their leader Cleon (Dorsey Wright), the other eight Warriors escape the melee and debate their next move, knowing they are deep in enemy territory.

Meanwhile, Masai, second-in-command of the Riffs, takes charge, and declares a bounty on the Warriors. This sets the city's gang population out hunting for them, with a seemingly omniscient radio DJ (Lynne Thigpen) reporting on the events.

The Really Cool Shit

Over the years, The Warriors has developed a significant cult following. At Seattle’s Grand Illusion Cinema, programmer Zack Carlson remembers, “people were squeezed in, lying on the floor, cheering". Entertainment Weekly named The Warriors the 16th greatest cult film on their "Top 50 Greatest Cult Films" list. The magazine also ranked it 14th in the list of the "25 Most Controversial Movies Ever".

NUMBER 1

STONE

The Low Down

Stone is a 1974 Australian film, produced and directed by Sandy Harbutt. It was a low budget movie, written by Sandy Harbutt and Michael Robinson.

Police officer Stone goes undercover with the Gravediggers outlaw motorcycle gang, to find out who is murdering their members, one by one.

The film stars Ken Shorter and features Rebecca Gilling, Bill Hunter and Helen Morse. The film's soundtrack was composed by Billy Green and featured some members of his group Sanctuary. Motorcycles featured include the legendary Kawasaki Z1(900). Stone initially rides a Norton.

The promotional trailer clip on YouTube features narration by radio and media personality John Laws. The film was featured in the documentary, Not Quite Hollywood about Australian exploitation films.

The Story

When several members of the GraveDiggers outlaw motorcycle club are murdered, Sydney detective Stone (Ken Shorter) is sent to investigate. Led by the Undertaker (Sandy Harbutt), a Vietnam war veteran, the GraveDiggers allow Stone to pose as a gang member. Leaving behind society girlfriend Amanda (Helen Morse), Stone begins to identify with the Undertaker and his comrades Hooks (Roger Ward), Toad (Hugh Keays-Byrne), Dr Death (Vincent Gil), Captain Midnight (Bindi Williams), Septic (Dewey Hungerford) and Vanessa (Rebecca Gilling), the Undertaker’s girlfriend. Amid violent confrontations with the Black Hawks, a rival gang the GraveDiggers hold responsible, Stone uncovers a political conspiracy behind the killings. When the truth is revealed, Stone must choose between his job and his loyalty to the GraveDiggers.

The Really Cool Shit

I was lucky enough to have a really cool dad who would take me to see alternative and off-beat cinema all through the 70's. But Stone stood as being 'different' for a number of reasons, not only because it's a piece of Australian iconic underground and alternative cinema from the 70's. For me, even at an early age, Stone was a life changing viewing experience. It was the first time I had ever heard the word "cunt" in any movie, let alone any movie outside of a pornographic film. Stone was almost the Australian equivalent of the American "Easy Rider", but with a cultural flavour unique to the "Down Under" life style and experience in the 1970's. It was a film that captured a piece of our alternative and underground lifestyle, it showcased upcoming Australian acting talent, and remains as it was then, a confronting visual and thought provoking cinematic story. It took me ages to find a copy of it as I hit my teenage years, because it became one of those 'forgotten' movies that only a handful of people knew or cared about. Even today, it's still hard to locate a decent transfer copy of the film onto DVD. I only have it on VHS!!!

The title of this piece is "The Most Essential Cult Movies of the 1970's", and although we've kinda focused on the 'Cult' aspect, really, the key word in the meme for me is actually 'essential'. Movies you owe yourself to check out before the bucket list checks in. You may have seen The Warriors, hell, you might even have seen a few others in my list. But I can guarantee that whilst none of the movies falls into my preferred genre of Horror, all of my Top 5 Most Essential Cult Movies of the 1970's are indeed exactly that. Essential. Worth making the effort to hunt down and lose yourself in for an hour or so with the damn cell phone turned off, in homage to the fact we didn't have them annoying fuckers in the 70's to ruin our movie viewing experience anyway...

REFERENCES

(1) http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cult_film

Harold and Maude - http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Harold_and_maude

The Warriors - http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Warriors_%28film%29

Stone - http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Stone_%281974_film%29

Westworld - http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Westworld

Logan's Run - http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Logan%27s_Run_%28film%29

Written by stonerphonic © August 2010

Farewell Trash Video

2010-08-18T23:23:00.000+10:00

It's with a heavy heart that I officially report on the permanent closure of a Brisbane cultural institution: Trash Video.

Below is a copy of the last mail-out from Andrew Leavold, co-owner and manager.

---------------------------------------------------

You couldn't sell? Sadly, no. We had one serious offer on the table but it didn't work out. Our only choice is now to liquidate our entire collection and organize for new tenants to take over the lease as quickly as possible.

When's the final day? Sunday 29th August. This Friday night is the Official Wrap Party: a screening at Tribal Theatre, followed by a rock'n'roll extravaganza at the Step Inn (details are a little further along this email).

What happens to the left-over stock? We will continue to do what we have always done with excess stock – sell them via email lists and Ebay. Trash will continue as an internet presence, but without the public store front, and by selling rather than renting. So PLEASE stay on our email list, there's a lot more good stuff to come. To paraphrase the words of Fu Manchu, “The world shall hear from Trash again!”

What will you do with all of your spare time? WHAT spare time? Ha...but seriously, not running the store means more time to finish off the PhD, work on more film projects, and perhaps do some freelance stuff here and there. I'll keep programming Tribal Theatre screenings and our Schlock Treatment TV show on Briz 31 until I drop dead of exhaustion. Ultimately, though, life will be about new creative challenges, and I'll keep my eyes and ears wide open for new opportunities. If anyone's in need of the services of a scruffy ex-counter monkey, please drop me a line.

So...how are you feeling about the last fifteen years of your life drawing to a close? Weird beyond words. It's like being forced to make the decision to turn off the life support system on your fifteen year old child. But, as so many of our loyal readers have pointed out, it's about endings and new beginnings, and despite appearances I'm a born optimist, though Lord knows why...

And so, my friends, I ask you all to join us over the nest 13 days to drop by, pay your last respects, take a piece of Trash with you, and hope to see you this Friday night, at Tribal or the Step In or both venues, for a good old fashioned Irish style wake.

Viva! Andrew (co-owner, manager)

“COME AND GET 'EM!” EVERYTHING, AND I MEAN EVERYTHING, MUST BE SOLD BY SUNDAY 29th AUGUST

DVDs

VHS tapes

Posters, books, magazines

Shelves and shop fittings (even our couch is up for auction!)

EVERYTHING IS NEGOTIABLE but please be mindful that we are selling off our fifteen year collection reluctantly, and that many items are long out of print and considered quite valuable.

THIS FRIDAY: “FAREWELL TRASH VIDEO” OFFICIAL WRAP PARTY (or PARTIES!)

After fifteen years of unapologetic cultural terrorism, Trash Video finally closes its doors on Sunday 22nd August, and they're having the wrap party to end all wrap parties...

#1: Trash Video’s ARTHOUSE 101 presents the OFFICIAL TRASH VIDEO WRAP PARTY! Tickets only $8

8pm FRIDAY 20th AUGUST at TRIBAL THEATRE, 346 George St Brisbane

ESCAPE FROM THE PLANET OF THE TAPES (dir. Anthony Mullins & Kris Kneen, 2003)

Half-hour SBS documentary by husband-and-wife team, BAFTA-winning director Mullins and acclaimed author Kris Kneen, filmed during Trash Video’s turbulent evolution in 2000 from Valley hole in the wall to its current West End home.

“Reality and fantasy crash head on in this innovative documentary about Andrew Leavold, Australia’s leading cult video collector and his desperate attempt to save his life’s work. Andrew's alternative video store will close unless he can find an investor and move to a bigger premises. But will this expansion mean selling his soul to the corporate devil? Escape from the Planet of the Tapes tracks this crucial time in the history of Trash Video as Andrew wrestles with the future of his dream store. Gritty documentary realism melds seamlessly with elaborate ‘film noir’ style dramatisations of key events to capture Andrew’s unbridled passion for film and fun. This is a unique documentary experience, as stimulating as it is inspiring.”

LESBO-A-GO-GO (dir. Andrew Leavold, 2003) Trash Video’s feature film debut!

Review by Lachlan Huddy: “2003’s Lesbo-A-Go-Go, Leavold’s no-budget homage to 60s sexploitation icon Doris Wishman (a woman oft-referred to as the female Ed Wood) is ‘porn without porn’, a cheap, tawdry faux-morality play that propels hapless heroine Sugar from one hideous travail—cemetery rape, drug addiction, rape-during-abortion—to the next before having her stabbed with a syringe and condemned by a priest as she’s dying on the footpath. Shot in grainy black and white and featuring no sync sound, Lesbo is as trashy in its delivery as it is vile in its content, and leaves you in need of a shower and a good stiff drink—right on the money, in other words. It’s elevated by a soundtrack just this side of kick-ass and a frankly awesome psychadelic colour sequence, and is a tremendously fun, sustained in-joke for Wishman fans.”

Lesbo features a stunning array of underground film and music identities: a terrifying-looking Geoff Corbett (Sixfthick), Melbourne’s Fred Negro as the Vision from Hell, Richard (MUFF/Bloodlust) Wolstencroft as a backyard abortionist, Gazoonga Attack as an all-girl gang, and The Aampirellas (featuring Evil Dick from HITS!) as drag act.

“…more entertainment value in its miniscule budget than a hundred Matrix Reloadeds” (Boris Lugosi, Girls, Guns and Ghouls)

“Ugly, reprehensible and morally repugnant. And I MADE the film.” (Andrew Leavold)

OFFICIAL WEBSITE: www.scattershotflix.org/Lesbo-A-Go-Go/

#2: "IT'S THE END OF TRASH VIDEO AS WE KNOW IT (AND I FEEL BLIND!)"

7.30pm til late, FRIDAY 20th AUGUST at STEP INN, Fortitude Valley

BANDS! Featuring

HITS

1.1.1.

The NEW JACK RUBYS

The SHREWMS

LOBSTER PROPHETS

MAIN STREET BRATS

and emcee WAYNE KEYS

Plus BIG-SCREEN MADNESS! DANCERS! PRIZES! Tickets $12/$10

THIS WEEK'S PRESS BLITZ

Brisbane readers can find articles this week in the Courier Mail (Tuesday) and 3D World (a Sydney magazine only recently launched here). One of the most comprehensive pieces ever on the shop, however, is by Lachlan Huddy for a new e-magazine soon to be launched by former Empire Magazine and SBS Movie Show scribe Michael Adams:

“Schlockbuster” was one title jockeying for the prize. “I Spit On Your Video” and “Video Sleazy” were all in contention, too. In the end, though, simplicity carried the day, and Brisbane’s first, finest and filthiest alternative video store was baptised Trash Video.

“It’s a good filter,” says owner-manager Andrew Leavold of the evocative moniker. “That kind of passive, mindless consumption that categorises most movie-watchers. It’s a good filter to scare them off.”

Since 1995, Trash has been the proud purveyor of everything beyond the flow of cinema’s mainstream. Shock, schlock, art, grunge, indie, cult, foreign, rare, grotesque or sublime—if it exists outside the realm of casual moviegoing, Trash is the place to find it. Burning to take in Microwave Massacre, the self-declared worst horror movie ever made? It’s in the Trash stash. Can’t track down Leni Reifenstahl’s 1930s Nazi propaganda Triumph of the Will for that modern history essay? Pick it out of the Trash. And while you’re there, why not indulge some nostalgia and plump for the Twin Peaks Season Three double-VHS pack? Yes indeed, Trash is everything the modern video shop isn’t: cluttered with obscurity, disorganised, and bursting with character.

But to speak of Trash is to speak of Leavold, its indefatigable founder; the store is but an extension of the man himself, for whom the creation and consumption of culture—popular and otherwise—is more than a business or pleasure: it is a way of life. And has been for a long, long while.

“Basically this was an idea that I had when I was ten,” Leavold says. It’s a July afternoon and we’re talking over the counter of Trash’s current store in Brisbane’s West End. To the left sit neat piles of rental DVDs stacked thirty and forty high; to the right the store computer is near-buried under posters and VHS and other bric-a-brac your local Civic would’ve sold off by now. There’s a touch of gloom in the air, but we’ll get to that later—for now there’s only Leavold in a Coney Island T-shirt, with his errant blonde hair framing a wild-eyed face, telling Trash’s tale. It is, he says, “a story of childhood obsession taken to ludicrous extremes.”

The son of a civil engineer, Leavold spent his early years globetrotting with a father who tended to accept “filthy overseas jobs” throughout the Middle East. Starved of pop culture care of the slim pickings on Arabic television, Leavold took his first step along the road to Trashy treasure with the advent of betamax (a videotape format, for all you post-Gen X-ers). Late-night gems like “old Vincent Price films” and “the most grotesque horror films that were just coming out as part of the Italian New Wave” infiltrated the Middle East through pirate video networks, the “betamax grapevine”—and found a spellbound audience in ten-year-old Leavold.

“The Indian guys who used to run the local video store used to wait for me to come in,” he recalls fondly. “I’d pedal up on my bicycle and they’d go, ‘Ah! We have a new zombie film for you. But don’t tell your mother!’ And they would feed me vile garbage… It got to the point where my mother had written to every one of the video shops I was a member of saying, ‘Do not give my son any more horror films’.”

But it was too late for little Andrew: an idea had taken root. “All the time, I kept dreaming about having a video shop that had all these movies that I loved in it. This kind of anal obsession as a ten-year-old to control culture.”

It was an obsession anal enough to persist throughout high school and into his first job, during which he was “blowing every paycheck on a pile of VHS.” When his trove hit critical mass—at somewhere around 2000 tapes—Leavold went public and Trash Video was born, its first home a little walk-up over indie music club The Zoo in Brisbane’s Fortitude Valley. It was a fine neighbourhood to raise an alternative video store: grungy, unpretentious and not quite suitable for the under-twelve set. But time waits for no cult film fan, and after five years, when Trash’s stock had more than tripled, the Valley had mutated.

“Trendy fuckheads on bad drugs,” Leavold laments. “When all of a sudden you find yourself surrounded by stores that sell $80 can openers, it’s time to go. The lease was up; we thought it was either sink or swim time. We either try to do this somewhere else on a larger scale or give up. And luckily one of our readers on our email said, ‘Why don’t we try West End?’ That was ten years ago.”

And what a decade it’s been. Trash’s stock has swollen to a horde of more than 16,000; a silent partner has come onboard as co-owner; a 2003 documentary—Escape From the Planet of the Tapes—has been made about the store and about Leavold; and a loyal, close-knit community of renters has entered Trash’s orbit. In the few hours I’m here, Leavold greets every walk-in with a smile, easy conversation or a few flicks reserved just for them: “Have I got something for you?” is a regular refrain. No clinical efficiency here; just a shared love of the movies, a gentle reminder of how unifying a force cinema can be.

Still, this is retail. It can’t all have been sugar and spice and everything nice. Can it?

“I’ve seen you rip up someone’s membership,” a friend and regular customer says to Leavold, smirking, before quoting, “‘Just get out! No! No, I don’t care what you say! Just get out!’”

Leavold is reflective. “Yeah. There have been a number of those public meltdowns...I hate a lot of people for years. I carry grudges. Anyone who transgresses the rules of politeness here.”

And what are those, I wonder?

“It’s based on ever-changing brain chemistry,” Leavold grins, with a good-natured twitch of the nostril.

Outside Trash’s hallowed aisles, meanwhile, the past decade saw Leavold cement both himself and his store as cult cinema icons with Film Club, weekly screening nights across Brisbane that ran until 2006 showcasing the best, worst and weirdest of Trash’s back catalogue. He also launched Schlock Treatment, his weekly cult film TV show on Brisbane’s Channel 31—and added his own cult curios to the world of cinema.

2003’s Lesbo-A-Go-Go, Leavold’s no-budget homage to 60s sexploitation icon Doris Wishman (a woman oft-referred to as the female Ed Wood) is “porn without porn”, a cheap, tawdry faux-morality play that propels hapless heroine Sugar from one hideous travail—cemetery rape, drug addiction, rape-during-abortion—to the next before having her stabbed with a syringe and condemned by a priest as she’s dying on the footpath. Shot in grainy black and white and featuring no sync sound, Lesbo is as trashy in its delivery as it is vile in its content, and leaves you in need of a shower and a good stiff drink—right on the money, in other words. It’s elevated by a soundtrack just this side of kick-ass and a frankly awesome psychadelic colour sequence, and is a tremendously fun, sustained in-joke for Wishman fans.

Like any cult film worth its salt, Lesbo offended audience sensibilities and ignited a riot of ire amongst the moral majority—particularly when a drunken interview that Leavold gave to Brisbane newspaper The Courier Mail left the mistaken impression that there’d been more than just simulated sex going on during a shoot at Toowong Cemetery.

“The article basically said we were filming gangbangs on open graves,” Leavold deadpans. “And immediately there was a shitstorm.” Quite sensational for a film which, Leavold thinks, could have scraped in with a PG-rating. “None of what you see on the screen is explicit. There’s no profanity whatsoever. There’s no onscreen salaciousness. It’s all implied.”

After three years the shitstorm had slackened enough to allow Leavold back behind the camera for 2006’s Bluebirds of Peace and Destruction, a fictionalisation of the lesbian vampire killing in Brisbane’s Orleigh Park in 1989. With $2000 from a generous Trash customer, Leavold set about crafting the tale of three damaged women who abduct a family man and murder him to drink of his blood.

“I thought, right, the only way to do this is to totally improvise it,” Leavold says. “Get two genuine…” He pauses, selecting his words.

“Crack whores?” offers the teenage work experience girl, familiar with the story.

“I wouldn’t say crack whores,” Leavold replies. “No, I would say two girls who are no strangers to the sex industry.” He cackles infectiously.

The girls may be no strangers to the sex industry, but they’re no strangers to credible emotion, either; Bluebirds’s documentary aesthetic is complimented by engaging naturalistic performances from its lead actresses—friends of Leavold’s then and still—and a fantastically foreboding score. Assembled with taut editing, it’s a snappy, authentic and brutally effective ride into Brisbane’s seamy underworld.

Then there’s the upcoming The Search For Weng Weng. If there’s a magnum opus in Leavold’s life so far, this is it: a guerilla doco about Weng Weng, star of For Y’ur Height Only, a Filipino spy thriller about a kung fu-kicking midget James Bond.

“Weng Weng was, I think, was one of those catalytic moments where cinema changes forever,” Leavold says. “Literally a bolt from the sky. I’d never come across a film that was so inadvertantly a masterpiece… Somehow that absurd image of a kung fu-kicking midget had a weird kind of humanity about it and I wanted to know where he came from, what his real name was, I wondered if there were other Weng Weng films.”

Filmed over four years and as many trips to the Philippines, Search is now in post-production, Leavold struggling to “get across the surreal nature of the Philippines and the bizarre way that things just literally fell out of the sky during the search for Weng Weng in order to piece that story together… that layer of weirdness and serendipity that covers everything.”

In the meantime, his work on Search gave birth to Machete Maidens Unleashed!, the new documentary from Not Quite Hollywood’s Mark Hartley, which had its premiere at the Melbourne International Film Festival on July 24.

“I signed [Search] over to a producer here,” Leavold explains. “She approached ABC. ABC went, ‘We’d rather have a more conventional, essay-based documentary on B-filmmaking in the Philippines, like Not Quite Hollywood, so why don’t we get that nice chap who made Not Quite Hollywood to make it?’ And I went, [sighs] ‘Fine’, graciously stepped aside, and Mark came onboard.”

Leavold’s time in the Philippines also seeded the idea for a fittingly spun-out feature film, which is now at second draft stage and has secured partial funding. “It’s about an Australian who goes to the Phillipines to try and make a dwarf kung fu remake of The Harder They Come, the Jamaican Spaghetti Western. Ends up losing his shit, you know, Francis Ford Coppolla-style.”

And is there any better way to lose one’s shit?

Amid it all, his exhaustive research into Weng Weng caught the eye of Brisbane academia, and landed him a place in—of all things—a doctorate. “Griffith University said, ‘Why don’t you just turn it into a thesis? You’ve done all your research. Now just write the damn thing.’” So the directorial credit for The Search for Weng Weng just might read Dr Andrew Leavold…

With so many balls to juggle, it’s a miracle that Leavold can keep them all in the air and still have time for the store that started it all.

But can he?

“You know,” he says, gesturing around the shop, “you spend seven to ten hours here, you have very little enthusiasm for anything else.”

Ah. Remember the touch of gloom in the air we were speaking about earlier? Here it is.

According to Andrew Leavold, digital’s killed the video shop. After fifteen years as Brisbane’s—and Australia’s—largest cult video store, Trash Video is closing its doors against the harsh light of a changing media landscape, in which the likes of Foxtel IQ, Netflix and Bigpond Movies are rendering quaint local video stores, with their physical contraints and limited stock, all but obsolete.

“The idea of an old-fashioned video shop has well and truly had its day,” Leavold says, and it isn’t the voice of bitterness, nor defeat, but the voice of a man content to move on. “The onus now is on ownership. It just means that we’re consuming culture in a different way now. Much more immediate. And, I think, with the switchover of technology, that’s our cue to exit as gracefully as we can.”

With the day winding down, I finally take my leave from Trash. I’ve stayed far longer than I’d planned, but it’s an easy place to get lost in. I pause, peering down the aisles at the rows and rows of VHS and DVD, thinking of the films inside each, the weird, the enchanting, the scandalous. Somewhere here is the mutant fish baby from Corman’s Humanoids from the Deep; the mad, murderous, Buddhist Jew-burner from the nutso Czechoslovakian horror The Cremator; the prehistoric stop-motion wonders from dino-western The Valley of Gwangi. Soon they’ll need to find new shelves from which to ply their strange nightmares and stranger dreams—and perhaps no-one will take them in. It’s a mournful thought, and I almost feel that words should be said, some goodbye prayer.

TRASH VIDEO: “We all thought the end of the world was 2012, and for Trash at least it comes two years early!”

1/73 Vulture St , West End Qld 4101, Australia

ph: 07 3844 7844 end_of_the_skype_highlighting (or intl code + 61 + 7 + 38447844)

OPENING HOURS: 12pm to 7pm, 7 DAYS A WEEK

e-mail: trash@trashvideo.com.au

website: www.trashvideo.com.au

HEROES - Part 4: Jello Biafra

2010-06-20T20:25:00.000+10:00

Thinking for myself...

I'll never forget 1994. Big changes happened to me then. I moved out of Queensland to go live in the Northern Territory in November 94. 1994 was the last time i had any interest in "non-exotic" women (read into that what you will). In 1994 I totally de-shitted myself of all the things that held me back from reaching my full potential & stopped me from embracing the me I wanted to be.

And in 1994 I actually got to meet one of my heroes face to face.

As far as music goes, 1977-1979 opened a whole new canvas for musical expression. Hell, for self expression. Because that's when punk spat itself clean into the public eye. And whilst I fully appreciate the cleverly crafted UK scene courtesy of Malcolm McLaren and Vivienne Westwood, the Sex Pistols can kiss my ass. In fact the Pistols are eloquently summed up in the title of one of their songs - Pretty Vacant.

For me, real punk has never (my never) been expressed as fully and complete as it was in a group of San Francisco Baysiders who embodied the real ethos of punk in every nerve and fibre of the body of their work.... the Dead Kennedys. From their name to their sound and more importantly the content and focus of their lyrical output, these guys were real 'punk'. Every album cover, every song title, every information inclusion was deliberate, directed, and damn well made you think. And that was the whole point. In fact if I had to choose a song or a lyric to truly represent what Dead Kennedys means to me, it would have to be the 1st line from 'Nazi Punks Fuck Off' – "Punk ain't no religious cult, punk means thinking for yourself” *(1)

Encapsulated in that single line is for me the true spirit of intelligence and forward endeavor – think for yourself. And I've carried that with me around the world, and it's gotten me in and out of trouble for sure, but by the same token it's kept me honest and true to who I am. And in 1994 at a little university lecture theatre I finally got the opportunity to meet someone who made me think. Really made me think. And question too...

By 1994 Jello Biafra had already left behind a deluge of controversy and carnage from the Dead Kennedys era, and the obscenity trial that brought about the group's demise. He was now fronting and guesting for a number of different bands, collaborating with some of the best industrial musos in the business, as well as carving out a niche on the spoken word circuit, which was the reason for his one and only Brisbane performance. It was like a dream come true. I finally found myself in the front row, dead smack in the middle, and out leaped Jello straight into his famous “Marshall Law” monologue, the one used by Ice-T on the 'Home Invasion' album. And for the next 2 ½ hours he enthralled us all with his unique style of 'edutainment' delivered with his instantly recognizable nasally high pitched vocal style. The delivery was faultless, peppered with rhetorical questions and thought provoking suggestion. Damn, it was almost perfect, marred only by some dumb-ass goth metal wannabe chick 5 seats up from me who passed out and hit the floor face first. Too much speed? Not enuff speed....

Best bit of it all was question time at the end. There's about 400 fully decked out punk/metal/ goth heads packed in here, about 5 media pundits, 3 4ZZZ radio kids recording it all for posterity, and me. And guess who got 1st shot at question time? Yeah baby!

So..... I asked this punk rock living legend, this famed singer, this dude who helped define a soundscape and musical template for generations to come, I asked Jello Biafra about Californian governor Pete Wilson's efforts to introduce proposition 187 into effect in California.

FUCK

You could have heard a pin drop in the joint. Here was my big chance to tell Jello "oh dude you've changed my life" or "hey man, when the hell are LARD gunna tour" or "dude, will you sign my records for me", and I asked some totally fucking obscure question about an unknown American politician and an unknown American law (remember, this was in 1994, Brisbane, Australia), none of which meant anything to anyone in the audience. Chris, what a fucking fool, what WAS I thinking, what a waste of a perfect opportunity to score my 15 minutes of fame.

HA! Fuck that shit.

My seemingly obscure question made this worn and weary performer instantly pep up and launch into an extra 45 minutes of amazingly animated monologue about this particularly evil and bigoted man and his stupid proposition (go on, Google proposition 187). It reinvigorated the entire afternoon, but most important for me is I put a shine into Jello's eyes. Cause he knew I knew the deal, and the absolute best bit it was all recorded for posterity by Radio 4ZZZ. And then yes, 27 other bozo's asked those dumb old banal and pointless questions anyway. And when all was said and done, 400 drug fucked music whores converged onto the stage to have Jello sign their record, CD, shirt etc. and I just stood way back behind them all, to watch poor old Jello signing his life away frantically, all the time noting him scanning the crowd like crazy, neck outstretched, and then **POW** we caught each other square in the eye. He smiled and nodded, I returned the acknowledgement, and as he tried to make his way through the crowd of forward lurching bodies, I casually walked away.....

My biggest regret in connection with "meeting" Jello was not my 'stupid' question, or the fact that I walked away when the dude obviously wanted to come up and say hi. Rather, my biggest regret happened a few years earlier. Just so happens I'd been given as a gift 2 exceptionally rare pieces of vinyl. They were transparent copies of the Dead Kennedy's 'In God We Trust Incorporated' and 'Plastic Surgery Disasters', both pressed in Italy. I also have in my possession (to this very day) a copy of an interview with Jello in some el-cheapo music magazine from the 90's. And in amongst all the questions thrown at him was 'if you could have any piece of memorabilia from the Dead Kennedy's days, what would it be?' And you know what he answered? Yep, the very 2 pieces of vinyl I had sitting in milk crates in a cupboard at my parents house.

Had being the operable word...

Cause during a huge cleanup one day at my folks place, they just happened to find themselves in the bottom of a box that went to the dump. I so would have loved to have been able to walk up to Jello on that day in 1994 and say thank you to him for all he's done for me as far as inspiration goes over the years, and then to hand those pieces of vinyl over, to be able to actually give back to someone who has given so much throughout his life. I'm sure there's an old saying that goes 'there's more happiness in giving than in receiving'.

But even if I couldn't thank him in the way I wanted to, for a brief moment in 1994 I got to connect with a person who has really inspired me, and continues to inspire me to this very day.

A little while ago the remaining Dead Kennedys took Jello to court so they could sell their old songs to big business corporations and 'cash in' on the resurgence of the 'old punk spirit', something which at the basest of levels goes totally against what that 'old punk spirit' was all about in the 1st place. And of course Jello said no, and 1 great big shit fight ensued. But, regardless of the outcomes, Jello Biafra never sold out. Ever.

And THAT, my friends, is punk. Real punk.

That sort of attitude and principled belief is what truly inspires me.

Stuff the mighty dollar.

Stuff the whole 'scene'.

It's about principles.

Being right. Being true. Thinking.

And I can't think of a better way than close this piece than with the last line from 'Nazi Punks Fuck Off' -

You'll be the first to go

Unless you THINK... *(1)

END OF PART 4

NEXT WEEK: HEROES - Part 5 - Cat Stevens

I believe in respect. I'm not asking you to agree with anything in this piece, but please allow me to have my opinion. Remember, I openly admit I don't read other peoples stuff. Hey, you don't have to read mine, and I'm happy to let you write yours.

Did i push your buttons? If I did, then share this shit with your friends.
Go on, hit that forward button...

All the words & mindless ramblings in BORDERLINE (c) 2008 - 2010 stonerphonic unless otherwise stated.
Find my punk ass - http://www.facebook.com/stonerphonic
Write my punk ass - stonerphonic@hotmail.com

Quotes

* (1) Nazi Punks Fuck Off - Dead Kennedys - "In God We Trust Incorporated" (Alternative Tentacles Records)

FILM REVIEW - Vindication (2006)

2010-06-19T11:10:00.004+10:00

Some things you just kinda know instinctively.

You don't put your hand into an open fire.
You don't chew on broken shards of glass.
Unless you're Steve Irwin, you just don't jump on crocodiles.
And when Clive Barker says that an indie horror film rocks, there's a fair indication it's gunna...

Vindication writer, director and producer Bart Mastronardi is part of the US East Coast low-budget independent horror film community that cranks out horror based genre features and shorts on a regular basis. Vindication, Mastronardi's first film as a writer/ director, is an independent, low-budget blood & horror fest with Clive Barker's very own seal of approval no less...

HIT IT UP

Vindication is your classic tale of morality, but with a lot more to it than meets the eye. It brings out and deals with the raw emotions of loss, of guilt, of failure, and their terrifying effects on one individual's life. It showcases the nightmarish results of attempted suicide, and the far reaching impact this has, on the individual, his family, and his friends.The story bursts forth on to the screen through a running stream-of-consciousness process, and takes the viewer through a series of brilliantly crafted visual scapes following Nicholas Betram (Keith Fraser) as he plunges us down the frightening spiral of a life "gone wrong", and an all consuming choice that ultimately costs him everything.

Vindication has a great cast and crew under Mastronadi's direction, and there's no end of talent on show through the production, in front and behind the camera. Henry Borriello provides the film's special FX and brings the horror of Nicholas' nightmares right to the fore of the films strong points. Mastronadi has employed the assistance of Dominick Sivilli with Vindication's production, and there is no shortage of strong visual representations and effects deployed by Sivilli throughout the film. Although some of the handheld camera work detracted from a portion of the viewing experience for myself personally, it was certainly made up for with some incredible montages and transformations that showcased Sivilli's ability to bring Mastronadi's story into the visual arena with the expertise it deserves.

I had the pleasure once again to enjoy the masterful audio experience that Tom Burns from Really Horrible Music brings to the screen. Burns worked on Jeremiah Kipp's CONTACT, and I truly felt that the sound scape Burns supplied for CONTACT proved to be one of the main highlights of the film. Burns has achieved a similar effect with Vindication, and there are some truly chilling moments where the audio work really intensifies the scene, and leaves an impressionable and lasting effect on the viewer.

Vindication's acting cast had quite a challenge ahead to get through the project, as the film took some time to complete, but their efforts and dedication certainly paid off. The cast received three major acting awards: Alan Rowe Kelly, Zoe Daelman Chlanda and Jerry Murdock, all for Best Supporting at the Dark Carnival Film Festival. The movie also won Best Picture and Director’s Choice at Dark Carnival and Texas Blood Bath.

THE DEAL

Nicholas Bertram isn't coping. With life. With himself. He lost his mother to suicide, his father has disowned him and treats Nicholas like shit, and he doesn't have enough money to cover his rent. But he has even worse problems. Along with self mutilation, leading to attempted suicide, Nicholas begins to lose his mind. Visions. Nightmares. Hallucinations. All of them featuring a demonic persona called Kon'Shens. This personal demon encourages Nicholas to let go of his built up guilt through brutal and violent ways. Nicholas, now enslaved by his guilt and his regrets, turns them into an all consuming rampage as he exacts revenge on all within reach...

THE FEEL

Vindication is a tale about guilt, about conscience, and shows the terrible outcomes of an individual stricken with guilt. It also tells of the sad result of an individuals attempted suicide as a solution to all of life's problems, all through an effort of self vindication.

There's an enormous amount of bloodshed and carnage towards the end of the film, but there's more to this tale of horror than just the gore and special FX. There are myriads of complex issues addressed through the film's 76 minute run time, and I found myself questioning thoughts of conscience, action, reaction, and other introspective feelings as I watched Keith Fraser take his characterisation of Nicholas through this sad tale of guilt and regret.

Too, I found a great deal of fantastic talent on display, including Jerry Murdock as Nicholas' father William Bertram. I have read other reviews where Murdock's portrayal received a rather negative interpretation, but I totally enjoyed his characterisation. Within 30 seconds of screen time, I instantly disliked William Bertram, hated him, and to me that's what good acting is about. Make me feel something, anything, towards the character. And Murdock fully achieved this for me. I wanted his character dead!!!

There's also a sweet cameo by Alan Rowe Kelly as fortune teller Urbane. Absolute screen magic!

On the negative side, a Panasonic DVX100B mini-DV had been employed for filming, which for me made the movie's "feel" come across at times more like a "Made for T.V." movie than the "Hollywood" feel Savilli achieved with CONTACT. I would have preferred something along the lines of what newbie filmmaker Bradley Scott Sullivan achieved with "I Didn't Come Here to Die", which was shot on the Panasonic Lumix GH1 DSLR. Whatever processing was used on "I Didn't Come Here to Die" has given the low-budget film an amazing "feel" which almost made it look like it had been made in the 1970's on 35mm celluloid.

A great story, lots of gore, and for those who like their horror with some deep messages that take some thought process involvement, then you might just find it in Mastronardi's Vindication.

SKULL SCORE OUT OF 5

THE REAL


Directed by	Bart Mastronardi
Produced by	Bart Mastronardi
Written by	Bart Mastronardi
Starring	Keith Frasier, Alan Rowe Kelly, Zoe Daelman Chlanda and Jerry Murdock
Music by	William Archiello
Cinematography	Bart Mastronardi
Editing by	Stolis Hadjicharalambous
Distributed by	Mastropiece Productions

REFERENCES

http://www.vindicationmovie.com/

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vindication_%28film%29

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0800255/

Written review and animated movie GIFs by stonerphonic © June 2010

HEROES - Part 3: Rizal

2010-06-13T17:18:00.001+10:00

Dr. José Protasio Rizal Mercado y Alonso Realonda (June 19, 1861 – December 30, 1896)

Most people in Western countries have never of this inspiring young Asian man. And it's such a crime. If you ever get a chance to read a biographical book on Rizal I promise you it's worth every minute you invest.

Rizal lived during the Spanish occupation of the Philippines. They stole his language, his beliefs, his culture, and when he came to an appreciation of this he channeled his love of his people and culture through writing to bring back to oppressed Filipinos their sense of dignity and self worth. Rizal never lived to see the complete realization of his dream to restore his people's dignity, which is so damn terrible in itself, but if nothing more it really should make all Filipinos so damn proud of their national hero.

Rizal was a Filipino polymath, a nationalist, and the most prominent advocate for reforms in the Philippines during the Spanish colonial era. He is considered the Philippine's national hero and the anniversary of Rizal's death is commemorated as a Philippine holiday called Rizal day. His 1896 military trial and execution basically made him a martyr of the Philippine revolution.

Rizal was a polyglot conversant in at least ten languages. Like, totally awesome dude. He was a prolific poet, essayist, diarist, correspondent, and novelist whose most famous works were his two novels, "Noli me Tangere" and "El Filibusterismo". These are social commentaries on the Philippines that formed the nucleus of literature that inspired dissent among peaceful reformists and spurred the militancy of armed revolutionaries against 333 years of Spanish rule.

If you ever get a chance to read these books, do it. I try not to recommend stuff to others, but both these books are full on inspiring stuff. When they came out, these writings angered both the Spanish and the Hispanic Filipinos due to their hardcore "insulting" symbolism. Both novellas are highly critical of Spanish religious leaders and the atrocities committed in the name of religion. And most importantly, both books centre on liberal and progressive ideas of individual rights and freedom, specifically, the rights for the common Filipino population.

So, why the hell do I, an urbanized white Australian male have any interest whatsoever in Rizal. Ummmm, coz he rocked!!! Dude challenged the ruling and religious authority of his time, not because he was some bad-ass rebel and hated politics and religion, but because these systems were wrong and committing atrocities to Rizal and the country he loved, and ultimately died for...

He hated the injustice, the corruption, the lies. Cool. If i see stuff going down that stinks of injustice, say, like the West Memphis 3, I can't ignore that. Hell, nobody should ignore that. To do so would be so untrue, to myself and to you. And, to top shit off, Rizal even has his head on 1 of the most widely circulated coins on earth. How cool is that?

As a political figure, Rizal was the founder of "La Liga Filipina", a civic organization that subsequently gave birth to the "Katipunan" led by Andres Bonifacio and Emilio Aguinaldo. Rizal was a proponent of institutional reforms by peaceful means rather than by violent revolution (keep that thought in mind kiddies, you'll need to remember that for a later piece). His martyred death was the catalyst that precipitated the Philippine revolution. Rizal's advocacy of institutional reforms by peaceful means rather than by violent revolution makes him Asia's first modern non-violent proponent of political reforms. As such, this makes Rizal really a forerunner of Gandhi and contemporary of Tagore and Sun Yat Sen. In fact, all four basically created a new climate of thought throughout Asia, leading to the attrition of colonialism and the emergence of new Asiatic nations by the end of WW2.

Rizal was totally appreciated by Gandhi who regarded him as a forerunner in the cause of freedom. Even Jawaharlal Nehru, in his prison letters, acknowledged Rizal's significant contributions to the Asian freedom movement. So yeah, all these other 'world leaders' regarded his contributions as keystones, and acknowledged Rizal's role in the freedom movement as a foundation layer.

Rizal as a person is nothing less than genius. Honest. He was an ophthalmologist, sculptor, painter, educator, farmer, historian, playwright and journalist. And besides poetry and creative writing, he dabbled in architecture, cartography, economics, ethnology, anthropology, sociology, dramatics, martial arts, fencing and pistol shooting. Damn, there's seriously nothing this dude touched that he didn't rock at. But the coolest thing is Rizal just did stuff. He didn't back down when he knew he was right, again at the cost of his life. At the ripe old age of 35.

And the dude had real substance. He wasn't just all talk. You should check out the time he got called out for a duel. It's on Wikipedia somewhere. Every time I read about Rizal I can't help but catch a piece of his love for truth and his love for his people. For me, Rizal isn't just an epic dead hero. Rizal is just epic. Period. There's a place called Fort Santiago in the Philippines that houses a monument which stands near the place where he was executed. It was designed by Richard Kissling, the artist who did the famed William Tell sculpture. The statue carries the inscription "I want to show to those who deprive people the right to love of country, that when we know how to sacrifice ourselves for our duties and convictions, death does not matter if one dies for those one loves – for his country and for others dear to him."

Sure I don't dig the whole nationalistic slant, but I am inspired by what drove Rizal to lay it all down. No matter what. That's real courage. Real heroism.

So, I suppose the best way to end this piece is in Rizal's own words....

"He waited for a few moments to see if the depths would disgorge anything, but the waves closed anew, as mysterious as before, without adding a ripple more to the smooth surface, as if into the immensity of the sea only a tiny pebble had fallen".*(1)

END OF PART 3

NEXT WEEK: HEROES - Part 4 - Jello Biafra

If you're still here... thank you.

Please feel free to comment on my pieces. I willingly accept constructive criticism and comments on all my work. Hell, I'll take non-constructive criticism too. It's not life or death stuff y'know...

I believe in respect. I'm not asking you to agree with anything in this piece, but please allow me to have my opinion. Remember, I openly admit I don't read other peoples stuff. Hey, you don't have to read mine, and I'm happy to let you write yours.

Did i push your buttons? If I did, then share this shit with your friends.
Go on, hit that forward button...

All the words & mindless ramblings in BORDERLINE (c) 2008 - 2010 stonerphonic unless otherwise stated.
Find my punk ass - http://www.facebook.com/stonerphonic
Write my punk ass - stonerphonic@hotmail.com

Quotes

* (1) Jose Rizal, "El Filibusterismo", Chapter 39, second last paragraph

REFERENCES
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jose_Rizal

RETROSPECT: A is for... ARGENTO

2010-06-13T07:45:00.002+10:00

I got it. FINALLY!!!

Yep, the second volume/ slice to the Argento triple pack series. Thanks to the groovy guys at DVD King, I managed to score it at a very nice price, and am now kicking back to run thru the whole twisted shebang, one flick at a time, in order of DVD appearance, and inflict it on YOU.

6 Argento horror flix.

6 Very opinionated reviews by yours truly.

And a fuckload of GIF's to make it all worth your while to actually take the 3 seconds it needs to run your peepers across the damn post. And maybe even... COMMENT!

NICE...

For those who came in late -

Dario Argento (born September 7, 1940) is an Italian film director, producer and screenwriter. He is best known for his work in the horror/ slasher film genre, and has a huge output in the thriller/ giallo sub genre. Argento has had a major influence on modern horror and slasher movies throughout the last 40 years.

Most people categorize Argento's prolific cinematic output into "years" based on the categories he was working in at that time, and often in sets of 3 movies or Trilogies. Soooo, we get -

The Giallo years

Early in Argento's directing career, up until the 70's, he continued to concentrate largely on the Giallo or Thriller genre. The Italian "Giallo" usually refers to generic mystery works. Argento directed a number of very successful thrillers, such as The Cat o' Nine Tails (1971) and Four Flies on Grey Velvet (1972) which, alongside The Bird with the Crystal Plumage (1970), are frequently referred to as Argento's "animal trilogy". His best known and most referenced Giallo movie though would have to be 1975's Deep Red. Deep Red gave Argento international success, and influenced other directors to work in the Thriller genre.

The Supernatural years

Argento's "Supernatural" years kicks off with the ultra-violent thriller Suspiria (1977).Argento planned for Suspiria to be the first of a trilogy about "The Three Mothers", three ancient witches residing in three different modern cities. The second movie of the trilogy was 1980's Inferno. The Mother of Tears concludes the trilogy. After Inferno, Argento returned to the screen with the thriller Tenebrae (1982). He then went for a giallo and supernatural combination in Phenomena, also known as Creepers (1985).

Argento directed and produced scores of cinematic expression, but for the horrorheads who creep and slink across the meanderings of this blogspot, most of us are really only interested in his movies that lean towards the horror/ supernatural genre output, which pretty much looks like this -

* The Bird with the Crystal Plumage (L'uccello dalle piume di cristallo) (1970)

* The Cat o' Nine Tails (Il gatto a nove code) (1971)

* Four Flies on Grey Velvet (4 mosche di velluto grigio) (1971)

* The Five Days (Le cinque giornate) (1973)

* Door into Darkness (TV Series, Episodes Testimone oculare, Il tram) (1973)

* Deep Red (Profondo rosso) (aka The Hatchet Murders) (1975)

* Suspiria (1977)

* Inferno (1980)

* Tenebrae (aka Unsane) (1982)

* Phenomena (aka Creepers) (1985)

* Opera (aka Terror at the Opera) (1987)

* Two Evil Eyes (Due occhi diabolici) (Segment, The Black Cat) (1990)

* Trauma (1993)

* The Stendhal Syndrome (La sindrome di Stendhal) (1996)

* The Phantom of the Opera (Il fantasma dell'opera) (1998)

* Sleepless (Non ho sonno) (2001)

* The Card Player (Il cartaio) (2004)

* Do You Like Hitchcock? (Ti piace Hitchcock?) (2005)

* Masters of Horror (TV Series, Episode Jenifer) (2005)

* Masters of Horror (TV Series, Episode Pelts) (2006)

* The Mother of Tears (2007)

* Giallo (2009)

Out of this fine selection, I get to review, and inflict upon you, The Argento Classics Series on DVD -

Volume I

* DEEP RED

* TENEBRAE

* PHENOMENA

AND

Volume II

* THE BIRD WITH THE CRYSTAL PLUMAGE

* SUSPIRIA - COLLECTOR'S EDITION

* PHANTOM OF THE OPERA

Both DVDs were released in Australia through Umbrella Entertainment.
DVD I was released in Australia on 13 Jan 07

DVD II was released in Australia on 01 Feb 08

Each review on BORDERLINE will give a film synopsis, a breakdown of "important" stats and other technical junk, plus my own worthless and opinionated take on how the film came across to me. Oh, and I'm gunna rip a few frames and GIF them just so you don't have to put up with the same old "stolen from a Google search" image that accompany every other damn review currently out there. How can you say no to moving goddamn pictures?

So WATCH THIS SPACE buckos, coz I'm seeeeeriously hitting the TV & DVD player hard, and got my crayons and paper ready to take notes as I dig me deep into some... DARIO.

REFERENCES

http://umbrellaent.com.au/

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dario_Argento

http://dvdking.com.au

MUSIC REVIEW - LAZARUS A.D. - "The Onslaught" (2009)

2010-06-04T18:24:00.002+10:00

It's more than fitting to think that the almost dead Bay Area Thrash sound should be resurrected in full force by a band called LAZARUS A.D....

Ironic almost Alanis, don't you think. Bitch?

SPIN IT

8 Fucking seconds

Hell, less. Within a moment of catching the blistering lead notes from album opener "Last Breath" I was instantly, and totally, addicted to the sounds of Bay Area Thrash all over again. Even more so by the time I made it to the title track, tracks 5 & 6, in particular track 5 "The Onslaught Pt. 1 - Revolution". I've had that 1 track spinning now for about 5 weeks solid. And whenever I drop a LAZARUS A.D. Youtube link around the place, you guessed it, it's the link to Revolution.

THRASH OR DIE is the motto of Wisconsin based LAZARUS A.D. and after repeated spins of their 1st long player "The Onslaught", you know these boys mean that shit for real. Damn it, if these guys aren't the deserving bastard love-child of Metallica and Slayer I'll start listening to Justin Beiber. THAT'S how fuckin seriously LAZARUS A.D. and The Onslaught has impressed me.

Fast, furious, brutal, infectious, and just plain rockin the motherfuck out is the best way to describe the aural assault delivered direct to your earholes by the 10 track metal barrage.

MEET THE BAND

Dan Gapen- Lead Guitar/ Vocals
Jeff Paulick- Lead Vocals/ Bass
Alex Lackner- Guitar
Ryan Shutler- Drums

LAZARUS A.D. formed in Wisconsin in the spring of 2005. While LAZARUS A.D. is a thrash metal band, their sound isn't a simple throwback to the 80s bay area sound. They breathe a breath of fresh air into modern thrash with intelligent lyrics, memorable riffs, thrash breakdowns, mid-tempo grooves, and high-flying solos.

The band began work on their first full length album in January of 2007. Recorded and engineered by Chris Djuricic (Soil, November’s Doom, Michael Angelo Batio) at Studio One, and mastered by James Murphy (Death, Testament). During this time LAZARUS A.D. was approached by Earache Records to submit a track for an upcoming metal compilation. From The Onslaught, album opener "Last Breath" was one of the 16 songs chosen to appear on Thrashing Like A Maniac, and they were the only unsigned band on the entire compilation! The Onslaught was originally released by the band in 2007 and only 1,000 copies were pressed, then, in 2008, LAZARUS A.D. received a call from Metal Blade Records. The Onslaught was then completely re-mixed and re-mastered by James Murphy and saw worldwide release through Metal Blade Records in March 2009.

Since then the band has been furiously touring and promoting "The Onslaught", and it's only a matter of time before we see what LAZARUS A.D. is truly made of. I'd say metal...

JUDGEMENT DAY

I make no secrets about my absolute love for this album. It started out perfect, and just got better and better with each track. All killer and no filler isn't even close. And that, for me, IS the mark of any great album. If i never have to hit FF or skip, you know it's on the money. Hell, I have trouble turning off album repeat on this.

Stand out cuts for me were Last Breath, Thou Shall Not Fear, Revolution, and Absolute Power. I strongly encourage you to support these hardworking Wisconsin boys, go out NOW and buy this album, and when they're next in town, get off your lazy ass and spend a dollar to keep real metal alive.

SKULL SCORE OUT OF 5

THE REAL

BAND: LAZARUS A.D.

LABEL: Metal Blade Records

GENRE: Thrash/ Groove Metal

ALBUM: The Onslaught (2007 & 2009)

TRACK LIST

1.    Last Breath
2.    Thou Shall Not Fear
3.    Damnation For The Weak
4.    Every Word Unheard
5.    The Onslaught Pt. 1 - Revolution
6.    The Onslaught Pt. 2 - Rebirth
7.    Lust
8.    Forged In Blood
9.    Absolute Power
10. Who I Really Am

REFERENCES

http://www.lazarusad.com
http://www.myspace.com/lazarus1

http://www.facebook.com/lazarusad

FILM REVIEW - Sukiyaki Western Django (2007)

2010-06-04T03:01:00.002+10:00

Spaghetti Western?

Sushi Western...

That's right, you're getting Leone and Corbucci with chopsticks. And for what its worth, it's not a bad deal to "take home" at all.

HIT IT UP

Most horror junkies are aware of the influential and inspiring work of Takashi Miike, the man who brought us such films as "One Missed Call", the banned from cable TV "Imprint", the disturbing "Visitor Q" and seminal "Ichi the Killer", to name a few.

Of note though is the fact that Miike has produced and directed scores of films and television programs that fall outside of his noteworthy horror roll of honour. Regardless of your personal attachment to any specific movie genre, he still delivers on the valuable "must see" list of movies no matter what the subject. And Miike's brilliant Japanese Spaghetti Western "Sukiyaki Western Django" certainly can and should be counted on that "must see" list.

THE DEAL

Thankfully, Miike has done the right thing and stayed true to the basic spaghetti western formula, just giving it his trademark post-modernistic Japanese ultra-violent flavor. 1 innocent township with a fist full of treasure, 2 rival gangs fighting over said township for said treasure, 1 lone gun-for-hire maverick caught in between the 2 gangs, and 1 legend pertaining to a mysterious gunslinger from days gone by who you just know will blow in to save the day by the end of the 121 minutes of screen time.

Miike has used the historical rivalry between the Japanese Heike and Genji clans during the samurai era as the background for the story, only difference is that its set in Nevada. The film is scattered with references to the ancient samurai Genpei War clan rivalry, as well as the War of the Roses, and multiple spaghetti western references from the films Yojimbo and Django. It's a great ride throughout, and whilst it is ultra-violent per se, it's still a hell of a story, and a whole heap of fun.

THE FEEL

It has a myriad of classic western movie themes running as an undercurrent, and deals with love, loss, betrayal, all draped with beautifully colored cinematic visuals, and an amazing array of very talented cast. I was particularly taken by the cinematography, the vibrant colors, all carefully muted to take the sharp edge away.

It was for me, very very spectacular to watch as a movie, filled to its 10 gallon brim with motion, movement, rhythm and grace. And again, I was captivated by both the classic western style storyline, and the performances of a group of actors who for the most part would not have English as a first, or possibly even a second language. Yet they still totally kicked ass. Just with spurs on... OUCH!!!

There's no shortage of action, carnage, comedy, and the body count, while not on a Rambo scale, isn't too shabby. There's bucket loads of blood for those of us who appreciate Miike's ultra-violent imagery, and there's enough shoot outs and sword fighting to satisfy most lovers of the action genre.

By the same token, there's plenty of the ol' "deep and meaningful" in the storyline and plot as well, which from a punter's point of view makes it all the more fun. The dialogue is witty, quick, and well suited to genre, and certainly contributes to the film's fast paced style. Like most Takashi Miike films, this baby moves. And she moves quick. I never found myself scratching from boredom, and all my movie going senses were more than catered for. Sight, sound, story, engagement, it was all there in bucketloads. Even the dreaded cameo from Quentin Tarrantino didn't ruin it for me. At 1st, i must admit I kinda braced myself for it, but by his 2nd and 3rd appearances, rather than being the usual self indulgent wankfest you expect to occur, it didn't, and his character did add some value to the overall story, and even a hardass motherfucker like myself kinda giggled when he appears in the "Autobot" wheelchair towards the end of the film. More than meets the eye...

For sure, this movie won't be everyone's idea of a great cinematic experience, but it was more than enough for me. It had all the right moves to fill my action and carnage need, my love of engaging story lines, took my breathe away with dazzling cinematography, set and costume design, and offered up a cast of players who never left you in any doubt that this was a goddamn cowboy movie. With swords....

I felt the story was a perfect adaptation of your classic Italian spaghetti western, had all the elements needed to engage me from go to whoa, and I would have no problem in watching it again. And again. And again. Guaranteed a cult classic, and fully ranked high in my personal opinion.

SKULL SCORE OUT OF 5

THE REAL

Director: Takashi Miike

Producer: Masato Osaki

Cinematography: Toyomichi Kurita

Written by: Masa Nakamura

Staring: Hideaki Ito, Masanobu Ando, Shun Oguri and Quentin Tarrantino

REFERENCES

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sukiyaki_Western_Django
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Takashi_Miike
http://www.midnighteye.com/reviews/sukiyaki-western-django.shtml

FILM REVIEW - Night of Fear (1972)

2010-05-30T21:06:00.002+10:00

Long before Wolf Creek or SAW... there was Night of Fear.

Hell, long before Tobe Hooper's Texas Chainsaw Massacre, Australia came out with a psychological "chase" thriller that beat Hooper on the deranged backwater dead animal lovin' weapon wielding maniac stakes by a good 2 years. Chainsaws? pffft... just give me a shovel...

Originally banned by censors for 'indecency' back in 1972, and unseen now for over 30 years, this vintage piece of Australian horror cinema it is believed by some to be the 1st real example of a 'modern' Aussie horror movie (Wake in Fright is probably sighted as the 1st by most reviewers). Thanks to Umbrella Horror DVD, it has been carefully restored from original prints and released to DVD.

HIT IT UP

It must be said straight up that this is an independent experimental lo-budget cinema release from 1972. It is first and foremost a period piece of Australian independent cinema, so don't go into it expecting Wolf Creek, otherwise you will be disappointed. But if you want to see where Wolf Creek, SAW and even Texas Chainsaw Massacre's inspiration came from, with shades of Willard and Ben thrown in for the animal lover in us all, then you've come to the right movie...

Oh yes, there will be rats!!!

As far as horror movies are concerned, this falls into your typical psychological chase thriller category. Unfortunately, a lot of the first quarter of the movie is spent on non-related events that do nothing for the actual story at hand. Again, this was experimental film making in the early 70's, and the movie itself was originally meant to be a pilot for a television series called FRIGHT. FRIGHT never went into production, presumably due to the censorship issues surrounding Night of Fear. This also explains the films 54 minute running time during a period when most motion pictures clocked in at 90 minutes plus.

Despite the slow start, once the build up of hysteria begins, you can certainly feel the horror/ chase atmosphere creeping in through some very clever cinematography work, and some very unique set design. This ramps right up about the three quarter mark when we enter the cabin of the movie's antagonist, and meet with all manner of hoarded perversions strewn throughout his ramshackled abode. This movie, despite its age, had a plethora of risqué subject matter and content that certainly provided a solid base for experimental and creative cinema of all genres both in Australia and abroad. That alone makes Night of Fear worthy of consideration for all serious horror aficionados.

THE DEAL

Basically, we've got your deranged and reclusive cabin in the woods brand of psychopath who delights in dismembering unwary travellers, and keeps company with a massive colony of rats that have been raised on fresh meat and blood. Along comes the movie's damsel in distress, decked out symbolically in Little Red Riding Hood red, crashes the the car after being run off the road by a passing truck, and ends up being the target for said psychopath as she runs, screaming, through the Australian outback bush.

And be prepared for a lot of screaming, because it's the only dialogue in the movie apart from grunts and really weird noises by the psychopath, and the sounds made by blood hungry rats. Nobody speaks at all for the entire 54 minutes the film runs.

There's only 2 kills all up in the movie (human kills that is. there's a lot of horse heads hanging from trees, so animal lovers be warned), neither of which has any visual time on screen, apart from insinuation and the final scene of our damsel where the rats are eating her arm off. That doesn't mean we don't get to see any gore or disturbing visual sequences. They're in there alright, but it's no Rambo as far as body counts go. It's 1972 guys...

But there is a bit of T&A, which during the early to mid 1970's in Australia was a bit of a mainstay in our movies. And this movie was one of the 1st to try and push the envelope in this regard. Which is why it got band when originally released. By today's standards this movie would probably show less T&A than an episode of Spongebob, but hey, that's the 70's for ya...

THE FEEL

It feels like a 1972 movie. Bottom line. There's no CGI, no big name Hollywood A-Grade listings, but at least there's no happy ending. A ridiculous ending, but at least it's not happy. If you ever want to see THE worst police force investigators on the planet, then Night of Fear is your baby. Keep your eyes out for the skull in the cat cage... priceless.

It's hard to review such a dated piece of cinema up against today's endless outpouring of cinematic horror films, as it just won't stand a chance. But taken on its own merit, and considering the place it occupies in independent lo-budget cinema history, it does have a lot going for it. It was shot in pristine 35mm celluloid, and the quality of that really is apparent from a visual perspective. As mentioned, the set design, in particular inside the the cabin, was very inventive for its time; creepy dolls, taxidermy, newspaper murder clippings stuck to the walls. Stock standard fare now, but back then.. uh uh.

Even the musical score was a mile ahead of your standard horror feature back then. Looking at the Hammer movies, you got the same old pipe-organ style music with an orchestrated theme score and more incidental organ throughout. Night of Fear went Moog on your ass and had some very chilling sound scapes scattered throughout. Which is pretty integral considering there's no dialogue.

I must admit I enjoyed it a lot more with the commentary on, as this added a lot of time period information to the production and story behind the movie. But by the same token, even if you're not interested in the historical side of the film and just take it on as a horror film, you could do a hell of a lot worse than Night of Fear. I know I have...

SKULL SCORE OUT OF 5:

THE REAL

Director: Terry Bourke

Writer:Terry Bourke

Starring: Norman Yemm, Carla Hoogeveen, Mike Dorsey, Briony Behets

REFERENCES

Trailer - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Rrydr60oop0

Review - http://www.michaeldvd.com.au/Reviews/Reviews.asp?ID=5989

Night of Fear - http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0130905/

HEROES - Part 2: Malcolm

2010-05-30T17:09:00.000+10:00

Malcolm Little. Detroit Red. Malcolm X. El-Hajj Malik El-Shabazz.

Malcolm was an African American Muslim minister, public speaker, and human rights activist. To his admirers, he was a courageous advocate for the rights of African Americans, a man who indicted white America in the harshest terms for its crimes against black Americans. His detractors accused him of preaching race hatred and violence. He has been described as one of the most influential African Americans of the 20th century.

I'm not going into detail about the brief but brilliant life of Malcolm X. You can do that yourselves. It's called Google.

Rather, this piece focuses on how Malcolm's life, reasoning and actions affected me.

In fact, you can sum it all up in the 1st line of this piece. Malcolm changed his name with each change in his life, his thoughts, his directions. The name itself served a particular purpose, but it wasn't what made Malcolm "Malcolm". It was a line of demarcation and meaning, but you have to drill deeper.

For me, the desire to change in itself is what i find inspiring, and what makes Malcolm 'heroic'. I don't agree with some of the directions taken or the causes he championed. And i probably need to point out right about now that I have only an academic interest in Malcolm's religious & political views. Hell, in anybodies religious & political views.

My admiration stems from the fact that when Malcolm worked out through self reflection that he was wrong, he had the humility to admit it. And the courage to change.

After he performed the hajj, Malcolm's view of white people changed. In a famous letter from Mecca, he wrote that "the white people he had met during his pilgrimage had forced him to "rearrange" his thinking about race and "toss aside some of [his] previous conclusions."" *(1)

And he had to do it all publicly.
And sometimes had to turn his back on his family and friends, because to him being 'right' was more important.
In the end more important than life itself.

And being 'right' did cost him his life.

True, a live dog is better than a dead lion, but the fact is we're all gunna die, and I'd rather die for something i believe in than to die for nothing at all. And even better to have that life and death inspire others to think and to change.

Malcolm had the right perspective on life's important issues, issues that really matter. And an understanding of the fact that realization of self, spirituality, family and community are what really counts. So altho i don't agree with certain choices made and certain beliefs Malcolm held, he had the 'template' right. And most important he had a good heart, good intentions, and put his passion into action. So, that's the best thing i can take away from Malcolm's life to put into practice.

And that's what I'm doing now guys... following my passions.

Admittedly, there are so many highlights to his short life story, but for me the most inspiring influences about change comes from a statement Malcolm made about a white girl who wanted to help black people. Goes like this -

"Brother, remember the time that white college girl came into the restaurant — the one who wanted to help the [black] Muslims and the whites get together — and I told her there wasn't a ghost of a chance and she went away crying? Well, I've lived to regret that incident. In many parts of the African continent I saw white students helping black people. Something like this kills a lot of argument. I did many things as a [black] Muslim that I'm sorry for now. I was a zombie then — like all [black] Muslims — I was hypnotized, pointed in a certain direction and told to march. Well, I guess a man's entitled to make a fool of himself if he's ready to pay the cost. It cost me 12 years." *(2)

12 years is a hella long time to fuck up your life, so I'm using Malcolm's example to try and not do the same.

And hell, the most inspiring thing for me about Malcolm is Malcolm never worried about being popular.

Malcolm worried about being Malcolm...

And I'm not worried about what you think of me or my HEROES pieces. I'm worried about being me...

END OF PART 2

NEXT WEEK: HEROES - Part 3 - Rizal

If you're still here... thank you.

Please feel free to comment on my pieces. I willingly accept constructive criticism and comments on all my work. Hell, I'll take non-constructive criticism too. It's not life or death stuff y'know...

I believe in respect. I'm not asking you to agree with anything in this piece, but please allow me to have my opinion. Remember, I openly admit I don't read other peoples stuff. Hey, you don't have to read mine, and I'm happy to let you write yours.

Did i push your buttons? If I did, then share this shit with your friends.
Go on, hit that forward button...

All the words & mindless ramblings in BORDERLINE (c) 2008 - 2010 stonerphonic unless otherwise stated.
Find my punk ass - http://www.facebook.com/stonerphonic
Write my punk ass - stonerphonic@hotmail.com

Quotes

* (1) Malcolm X, Autobiography, p. 391.
* (2) Gordon Parks, "Malcolm X: The Minutes of Our Last Meeting", Clarke, p. 122.

FILM REVIEW - CONTACT (2009)

2010-05-26T21:47:00.000+10:00

The words "independent film" & "horror" generally fit well together, but usually for all the wrong reasons.

As an avid indie film buff, when it comes to lo-budget DIY productions, I fall into the category of either really really loving the film, or really really hating it. For me there's no middle ground. You’ve got about 15 minutes to make your mark, draw me into your story, and it needs to hit the target dead on, or you've lost me. Way it is.

So with 5 minutes LESS than that for the entire production, how the hell does Jeremiah Kipp's short horror film CONTACT (2009) stand a chance?

Quite easily, to be honest...

HIT IT UP

Kipp has assembled all the right ingredients, had them mixed perfectly, then delivers a 10 minute opus that not only grabbed my attention from word "go", but went on to suck me fully into the drug crazed experience that drives CONTACT along, hurtling at an incredible speed.

Based on a previous Kipp film "The Pod" (2006. written by Carl Kelsch) CONTACT strips things back to a bare-bones minimum and leaves the audience with that which matters most - a damn good story told well.

That doesn't mean that things have been "skimped on" when it comes to the finished product. Quite the reverse. In fact, I must admit I had difficulty keeping in mind that this was an independent minimum budget production. Filmed in wide-screen black & white, from the opening title sequence right through to the closing credits, you fully get the feel you’re watching a major fully bankrolled blockbuster. And there's a damn good reason why it feels this way.

Kipp knows his stuff, you can feel it throughout the film, and as stated, he's managed to assemble the right people for the right job with CONTACT. Director of Photography Dominick Sivilli has taken Kipp's story and vision and portrayed it with a visual conception that gives the punter a truly rewarding viewing experience. The cinematography and visual effects deliver as far as effective storytelling goes, and all this with minimum dialogue, and minimum bullshit. The black and white, for me personally, definitely adds value to the storytelling process of CONTACT, and creates a rich atmosphere amongst the story's drug fuelled haze to lose yourself in along the way.

Added to this mix are masterstrokes of sound from Really Horrible Music's Tom Burns. The film's musical score and post production sound effects have provided Kipp's visual nightmare with a sinister, dark undercurrent that leaves the viewer on edge, but deeply engaged, right to the very final sequence.

THE DEAL

The story itself revolves around lovers Koreen (Zoe Daelman Chlanda) & Westy (Robb Leigh Davis) and their endeavour to draw closer thru a naked, drug fuelled love session that goes terribly, terribly wrong...

As far as visual performances go, there's so much to feast upon. The captivating Zoe Daelman Chlanda carries the story with a sense of vulnerability that implores your sympathy, and Robb Leigh Davis, downright the best piece of Hendrix/ Lynott homeslice to hit a horror flick in ages, totally won me over with his character's natural charismatic suaveness. And all this sans clothing. Yep, more than half their screen time they're starkers.

Seriously... drugs, nudity, horror... what's NOT to like?

THE FEEL

Like I’ve already mentioned, as an indie film punter, it's either fully hit, or totally missed. Great visuals, top notch story & performances, superb soundscape (honestly, the sounds are uber-sweet), and did I mention there are drugs, horror and nudity...

For CONTACT, I’d double tap it. Easy. Consider CONTACT... fully hit. But hey, don't take my expert opinion of this film, here, go do it yourself... http://www.contact.shroggle.com/

SKULL SCORE OUT OF 5:

THE REAL

Produced by Alan Rowe Kelly, Bart Mastronardi
Directed by Jeremiah Kipp
Music by Tom Burns
Written by Jeremiah Kipp based on "The Pod" by Carl Kelsch
Director of Photography: Dominick Sivilli
Sound Mix: Tom Burns, Really Horrible Music
Edited by Dominick Sivilli
Special Effects Makeup: Daniel J. Mazikowski
Starring: Zoe Daelman Chlanda, Robb Leigh Davis, Katherine O'Sullivan, Tom Reid, Danny Lopes and Alan Rowe Kelly

REFERENCES

The Pod - http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0883379/
Contact - http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1537732/
Contact film - http://www.contact.shroggle.com/
Jeremiah Kipp Interview - http://www.colonelscrypt.com/Interviews/Jeremiah%20Kipp/index.htm

Written review by stonerphonic © May 2010

HEROES - Part 1: The Confession

2010-05-24T05:40:00.000+10:00

I have a confession to make.
A startling revelation to share.
A secret so deep I'm almost afraid to write it all down.

Before I do tho, I have to clarify something 1st.

The pieces I write over the coming weeks are not directed to any 1 individual (you should be so lucky) or written in response to anything anyone out there has written on any site or page. Rather, it’s just another wonderful opportunity to keep people stuck in front of a PC screen to ensure the full amount sterilizing radiation contributes to a further decline in populations in western civilization.

Actually, these particularly dull and boring pieces are an opportunity for me to share, to purge, to inspire, to let you into me, and me into you. Which, to be honest, I never do... much.

So...no more mucking around...

THE CONFESSION

I rarely if ever read other peoples blogs.
Or bulletins.
Or updates.

**insert dramatic musical sounds now**

There. It's out. I'm a free man.

I AM SO SORRY

I've tried. God knows I honestly have. But I just couldn't keep going.
I couldn't read another rant against an ex-something.
Another line about how good/ bad/ indifferent you are.
Another pointless fucking list.
Another add for some obscure dance club somewhere.
Another suck up to your friend.
Another dumb ass pass about how good your band (or your best friend's band) is.

So, I stopped reading peoples blogs + bullets + updates ages ago. And more importantly, swore on the skull of my dead grandfather not to inflict my own verbal diarrhea on others. Hey, the world already has 2 squillion Perez Hiltons, why add to that mountain of puerile vomit?

So, what made me do THIS.
No, dude, really...

Most people on my sites and pages don't know me. At all.

We've never met, probably never will. Even those whom I've met don't really know me. In fact half of you don't even know my real name. Which is totally unimportant anyway, and is probably another driving force behind why I'm writing now... and that reason is... it's not who I am, but what I am that really counts.

As one of my heroes (one I've actually met) once stated "here today, gone tomorrow, don't need myself remembered. but what I help create and leave behind is important to me..." *(1)

So, if who I am is not important, and what I am is, then it goes to follow that getting to know what and who helped to make me what I am is an important step in getting to know me better.

Dig?

And what's shaped me more than working on the 9 - 5 treadmill?
More than 'life' experiences?
More than lovers (and ex lovers too)?
And... OMG ...more than even MUSIC...???
Are my heroes.
Hence the titles of these pieces.

So, how do you define what is a hero? What qualifies (or disqualifies) someone as being 'worthy' of hero status?

What makes a hero....a hero?

***and your comment would be...***

Well, the definitions of hero on the Web are -

1. A man distinguished by exceptional courage and nobility and strength; "RAF pilots were the heroes of the Battle of Britain"
2. The principal character in a play or movie or novel or poem
3. Champion: someone who fights for a cause
4. Greek mathematician and inventor who devised a way to determine the area of a triangle and who described various mechanical devices (first century)
5. (classical mythology) A being of great strength and courage celebrated for bold exploits; often the offspring of a mortal and a god
6. (Greek mythology) Priestess of Aphrodite who killed herself when her lover Leander drowned while trying to swim the Hellespont to see her
7. Bomber: a large sandwich made of a long crusty roll split lengthwise and filled with meats and cheese (and tomato and onion and lettuce and condiments); different names are used in different sections of the United States.

Gee Google, thanks for that!!!

For me 'hero' goes much deeper. In fact, it's not really the hero per se, as much as what they do to inspire and motivate me, make me challenge myself, make me change me, that qualifies an individual as a hero for me. And in some cases it not even wot they did as much as WHY they did it. Their motives, their reasonings...

My definition obviously disqualifies from my 'hero' list pretty much every damn hero ever held up to our ever receptive faces by this world's media/ propaganda machines.

Hell, I'm pretty much unimpressed by any current public figure or organisation daily thrust into the spotlight for our entertainment & amusement. It's all just McEyeCandy ™

None of them make me want to change me, let alone rise up and make a change in my community, or even slightly aspire to an inkling of world change.

Which is probably why I don't watch TV, or see the latest install of the newest teen/ comedy/ action flick @ the movies. This sentiment is reflected again in a quote from one of my heroes - "A lethargic population is the key to our control, who'd rather watch someone's life on TV than participate in their own" *(2)

Kinda sums up for me the reason why we no longer see the heroes so prolific before the 1970s. Our eyes are now so glazed over and the constant bombardment of useless 'infotainment' has dulled us all into a state of contented inactivity. It's all too much, couldn't be bothered, and as long as I recycle my Coke cans I'll feel content in knowing I've done my bit to reduce our carbon footprint. To be honest I couldn't give a flying fuck about our alleged carbon footprint. In fact most of my heroes were long dead before this buzzword was ever conceptualized.

And whilst most of my heroes carried the altruistic torch for a cause or reason, again, I'm not interested in the torch, as much as what motivated them to carry it, and even more so, their ability to change torches when it was discerned to do so.

And that's "THE KEY"

You can stuff that whole nationalistic diatribe of "my country, right or wrong" fair up your ass. What a load of crap. Again to quote one of my heroes "If you're wrong you're wrong... and if you're right you're right" *(3)

And most of my heroes had the intestinal fortitude to both stick their hands up and admit to being wrong.... and then CHANGE.
Again and again.

THAT ability is what makes my heroes "HEROES".

Reflection. Self analysis. Courage. Humility. Change.

And now I get to inflict my "HEROES" pieces upon you for the next 5 or 6 weeks.

HA!!! Sucks to be you....

END OF PART 1

NEXT WEEK: HEROES - Part 2: Malcolm

If you're still here... thank you.

Please feel free to comment on my pieces. I willingly accept constructive criticism and comments on all my work. Hell, I'll take non-constructive criticism too. It's not life or death stuff y'know...

I believe in respect. I'm not asking you to agree with anything in this piece, but please allow me to have my opinion. Remember, I openly admit I don't read other peoples stuff. Hey, you don't have to read mine, and I'm happy to let you write yours.
(oh, ok babyporridge, I'll admit I do read yours...)

Did i push your buttons? If I did, then share this shit with your friends.
Go on, hit that forward button...

All the words & mindless ramblings in BORDERLINE (c) 2008 - 2010 stonerphonic unless otherwise stated.
Find my punk ass - http://www.facebook.com/stonerphonic
Write my punk ass - stonerphonic@hotmail.com

Quotes

* (1) Jello Biafra. LARD - "Bozo Skeleton" Last Scream of the Missing Neighbours (Alternative Tentacles Records)
* (2) Jello Biafra. No Means No + Jello Biafra - "Bruce's Diary" The Sky is Falling and I want my Mommy (Alternative Tentacles Records)
* (3) Malcolm X. Malcolm X + Keith Le Blanc - "No Sellout" (Tommy Boy Records)

Welcome, to the dive...

2010-05-23T16:39:00.000+10:00

My name is stonerphonic, and I am a recovering blogaholic.
It's been 20 months since my last blog...

With the termination of my stonerphonic Myspace page, my creative juices have again become stagnated. A number of people reading this would be familiar with my daily output of tortured moving nightmares waiting on your page from me when you woke up each morning. You knew when I'd been around...

Few people if any reading this would be familiar with my el-lowrider Myspace page. It was primarily a blog page, where all those visions were set out in a totally different format.

Words.

My 'day job' consists of writing. I spew forth endless words in the form of policy, protocols and procedures in the government department that owns my blackened soul. I'm a wordsmith. I write shit. All damn day. My words govern the processes that affect an entire state. My words have power. My words make a difference.

All words make a difference.

Words change us. Words keep us from changing.
Words build us up. Words tear us down.
Words can start & end wars.
Words give life... words take life away.

Words make up who we are, and altho a picture paints a thousand words, with a handful of words I can color a world beyond the imagination...

BORDERLINE is meant to be a collection of blog posts, my thoughts & interests, divided into subsections -

The mundane, The profane, The unsane

As I spew forth my plethora of twisted ramblings, I will try to 'categorize' them within these 3 subsections. Over time I hope people will either work across all 3 sections, or latch on to a favorite section & follow that. Either way, somewhere in amongst my verbal diatribe, if nothing else, there's a piece of me for you to dissect & digest.

The mundane focuses primarily on me. About me. My own thoughts & feelings & general ramblings.

The profane is about things I'm interested in, things that capture my attention or interest in some way or another.

The unsane is just not "safe" to categorize in the other 2 areas for fear you might think I've lost the plot. Further.

I thought there's no better way to start than letting you get into my skull straight away. For the next few weeks I'll throw down a series I ran between 2007/ 2008 on my el-lowrider myspace page entitled "HEROES". And no, it's not a review of some defunct prime time television series...

Most people's thoughts, feelings and aspirations are molded & shaped by their "heroes" in life. People they admire. People they look up to. People they desire to emulate. And I'm no different. My "heroes" have definitely had an impact on who I am today. So... to get to know me in greater detail, to get to know how & why I tick, there's no better place than to look at those individuals who influenced me as i grew up. People who made me want to be the person I am today. Get to know them a bit better, get to know me a whole lot more. Maybe.

But, what EXACTLY is "HEROES". Well, it's a 6 part politically and socially incorrect barrage of mindless rantings (probably on par with a typical political debate) and full of futile and empty monologue.

Directed at no one in particular, rather, it’s just another wonderful opportunity 2 keep people (ie. YOU) stuck in front of a pc screen 2 ensure the full amount sterilizing radiation contributes 2 a further decline in populations in western civilization.
Dude, what an altruistic way 2 thin the herd....

BE WARNED – These blog posts are totally inconsiderate of the thoughts and feelings of other living things; animal, vegetable, and mineral.

If u are easily offended, particularly by a complete lack of social and political astuteness backed up and supported by narrow minded viewpoints and general negativity - STEER CLEAR.

Otherwise kids, hope you have fun.

O hey, please feel free to comment on my pieces. I willingly accept constructive criticism and comments on all my work. Hell, I'll take non-constructive criticism too.

It's not life or death stuff y'know...

I believe in respect. I'm not asking you to agree with anything in this piece, but please allow me to have my opinion.

And if you don't want me to have my own opinion, then this is for you...

So, each Sunday night, get your ass comfortable, and end your week with BORDERLINE.

Starting this Sunday night (May 23th) - HEROES - Part 1: The Confession

Now, here's Tom with the weather....

All the words & mindless ramblings in BORDERLINE (c) 2008 - 2010 stonerphonic unless otherwise stated.
Find my punk ass - http://www.facebook.com/stonerphonic
Write my punk ass - stonerphonic@hotmail.com

HEY, NOW GO OUT AND DO YOUR OWN.

I DARE YA...